


I MEAN IT

by minminhyo



Category: GOT7, JJ Project
Genre: Child Choi Youngjae, Child Kim Yugyeom, Child Kunpimook Bhuwakul | BamBam, Established Mark Tuan/Jackson Wang, I Will Go Down With This Ship, JJP IS FOREVERER, Jinyoung Having A Secret Crush on Jaebeom, Light Romance Nothing Angst, M/M, Single Parent Im Jaebum | JB
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:54:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 23,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27814147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minminhyo/pseuds/minminhyo
Summary: Jinyoung once again broken hearted when his 10th boyfriend in the span of 15 years broken up with him. Jinyoung finally think that Hyunwoo would be his last love but alas that guy only love his ass. So with his broken heart he went back to his hometown on which he never visit after he went to Seoul to pursue his study.It’s been 12 years.His parents keep nagging but he never go back, Jinyoung just giving tickets money for his parent to come to his own house at Seoul.Jinyoung just arrived at his hometown and enjoying the scenery when one fruit shop beside the adjacent road before his house catches his attention.Not the shop but the man who cheerfully talking with his customer outside the shop.Oh my god.It’s Lim Jaebeom!The story when the hopeless romantic Park Jinyoung come back to his hometown and the first person he saw is his crush Lim Jaebeom. Who Jinyoung are very sure is a straight guy.
Relationships: Im Jaebum | JB/Park Jinyoung
Comments: 6
Kudos: 71





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Well this is me having the little idea for JJP and occasionally writing it on a doc but then ended up with 2k words. So hope you guy will enjoy. And yes the title is from GOT7 new album Breath Of Love : Last Piece! Please support them! All the song is good!

Jinyoung passes the fruit shop and then abruptly stop.

No way. It’s not true. That is not Lim Jaebeom. Jinyoung decided to bring his car to a halt and park at the side road and decided it’s time to buy something from his parents and what is the best thing to eat in this sunny day? Fruits!

Jinyoung are walking toward the fruit stall but all his mind are playing the memories of clumsy council student vice president who always ask Jinyoung, the captain of basketball to ask his team to help the council student whenever there is school occasion and Jinyoung gladly agree even when his team mate curse him because Jinyoung will never let any second go when he can be with Jaebeom.

Jinyoung was totally in love with Jaebeom for all his high school years. He tried to be close to Jaebeom but it’s hard when Jinyoung knows that Jaebeom is straight. Jinyoung will always turn to a stuttering messed person when he is near Jaebeom.

So he decided to just yearning on his own and when he get the offer to study to Seoul, Jinyoung gladly accept it and hoping that he can forget his crush on Jaebeom.

Well it’s all turn well when he first met his first boyfriend the first day of college. But his relationship rarely last long. They usually will break up after one year. The longest is 2 year and a half. Hence the reason he has nine ex, oh wait, ten exes.

Jinyoung is only 30 years old office worker who wanted someone to be hold at the end of his tired day but almost of his exes is either a horny person or a super control one. Jinyoung is a simple and straightforward. If he doesn’t feel happy in any relationship he will break it.

Jinyoung try to find someone who can have his half interest but he is unlucky. It’s hard to find a guy who enjoy quiet time like reading or just talking about their day. No. Almost all Jinyoung ex love his face and body. At first Jinyoung enjoying all the attention. When they admired Jinyoung’s body and love making sex with him but at one point Jinyoung is tired and feel empty.

He wanted someone who can make him think about them even when there are not next to him. For example, Lim Jaebeom. He always thinks about what the guy who have the cutest twin moles doing whenever he break with someone. Whether Jaebeom is married, single or already move out of town. Jinyoung wanted to know but then he really are not that close to all his friend at high school after he went to the university, he mostly lost contact with all of them.

Now, he was walking toward the stall, he feels weird. Strangely nervous. Jinyoung don’t know why. He just saw a glimpse of a guy who he thought as Jaebeom but he already turn into some messy teenager.

Then out of blue some kids bump into him and fell.

“Oh my god I am so sorry!.”

The kid just look at him then cry.

“Oh no no no… Don’t cry.”

Jinyoung look around and wonder what he can do. He is not very good with children. They are just a small little monster and Jinyoung rarely see kid. He live alone and work in a office who 60% of his colleague is a single male.

“Yugyeom ah?”

Then Jinyoung heard an angel voice.

He look up and see worried Jaebeom come toward him and the kid.

“Appa!!! It’s hurt.”

The kid cry.

Of course, Jaebeom have a child. He is married and have a child and Jinyoung just thinking about the possibility that he and Jaebeom can be together (Hello! Jaebeom is straight)

Unlucky as usual.

‘’Hey, hey no cry. You are fine. Appa already check and there is no wounds. You are that strong that even you fall you did not hurt at all!” Jaebeom with a calm voice try to calm down his son.

“Really? Like Iron Man?”

“Yup, just like him. Now go along and try to find Youngjae hyung okay?”

“Okay.”

The kid hug Jaebeom then run away.

“I am so sorry, does my son hurt you in any way?”

“No, no, ha ha ha, I was supposed to say that.”

Jinyoung awkwardly laugh. He don’t know what to do because just a minute ago his mind has supply that Jaebeom might be like him.

Single and alone. 

“I am sorry but you look familiar? Are you from here?” Jaebeom

“Ahhh yes but it’s been a while that I come back here.”

“Sorry again but are you Park’s son? I forgot his name but you look like the mix of Mr and Mrs Park face.”

“Aaa, ah yes. Park Jinyoung.”

“Oh yes, Jinyoung shi. Sorry I forgot even when Mrs Park always talk about you. Thank god you finally come back. Poor Mr Park having to listen to all Mrs Park grumbling dissatisfied complain.” Jaebeom chuckle.

Jinyoung was in awe, Jaebeom look pretty when he talk about his parents.

“Really? I am sorry you have to hear that.”

“No worry, Mrs Park is my loyal customer, having to listen for her complain about her only son for ten minutes is small matter.”

“Suddenly I feel more sorry.”

“No need, so why are you here? Back for good?”

“Ah no, just for a few days.”

“That is good, your parents are not young anymore. They misses you, I know the feeling as I am a parent too.”

“That is your kid?”

“Yeah, the young one.”

“You have more?”

“Ha ha ha, why you sound so surprise?”

“Sorry, I just like we are the same age but….Ah no I mean, I never think about having a child and you have two.”

“Three.”

“Sorry?”

“ I have 3 little devil. Me and my husband adopted them.”

Wait a fucking minute.

A husband?

Husband as in male?

The human who have the same genitalia with Jinyoung?

“Your husband?”

“Sorry, are you uncomfortable with male and male relationship?”

“No, I am gay too.”

“Okay, I thought that you hated the idea, you have this look that flashes like you hated it.”

I hated the idea of you having a husband not the part that you are gay. Where is this come from?

“I am freaking sorry and it’s sound rude but when did you become gay?”

“Well that is rude but I don’t mind, I have been gay since I was 15. Long time ago.”

“But you never look gay when you in high school?”

“Well, you want me to wear rainbow uniform and being super flashy guy? It’s high school and that time being gay is not as okay as now. So, I try to be as subtle as I can be.”

“Really?”

Fucking Park Jinyoung. He should know this, because Jaebeom never had a girlfriend even he was so popular and he always hang with his male friend especially that Mark Tuan and Wang Jackson, the famous gay couple in school that time (only gay person knows about this because they keep it secret)

Jinyoung wanted to ask more question when he heard a loud yelling.

“Appa!!! Bambam does it again!!! He ruin my homework with his prank! Can we give him away now?”

“No I didn’t do it!! Yugyeom the one who spill the water!.”

“Just because you jumped on me. I am scared and accidentally throws the water.”

Jinyoung look at the three kids and then look at Jaebeom.

“Sorry, I need to go now.”

“Nevermind… You can go.”

“Did you need anything?”

“What?”

“You are here to buy something right?”

“I was but then I remember I already bought something.”

“O-okay?”

“I leave first.”

“Okay, nice meeting you.”

Jinyoung drive away to his house as soon as he can. He really need to take a rest because he just got bomb with the information that his crush who he thought as straight guy is actually gay and that same person already have three kids with his husband?

Oh my god!!

Jinyoung is super jealous right now.

Jinyoung arrived at his house while his mother were watering their garden and his father raking the leaves.

“Eomma!! I am home!.”

Jinyoung shout then run toward his mother.

“Yah, this ungrateful son! Now you finally home eh?”

“Sorry mom, I am really busy.”

Jaebeom hug his mother tightly.

“Now , now. stop this. Darling go and cooked something. Jinyoung is back make sure you cook all the meat that Jaebeom give to us.”

“The marinate one?Okay. You go and take a rest! I will cook a lot of foods!!”

Mrs Park excitedly skips and went inside the house.

“Glad you are here son. Your mom keeps asking when you will be back.”

“Yeah, sorry again.”

“Now go and get a rest, leave the suitcase, I will bring it inside.”

Jinyoung just nods then straight went to his bedroom.

He misses his room. There is a few changes new bed, new wardrobe but his things are still there. The room still feels like his old room. Jinyoung lay down and try to close his eyes but then Jaebeom’s face suddenly back in his mind.

Jinyoung try to just ignore it. He really is tired, driving for almost 6 hours and receiving the shocking information. He just shake his head and slowly the tiredness win and Jinyoung fall asleep.

His mother wake him up exactly an hour later. Jinyoung decided to freshen up and come into the dining area with a table that almost full with foods.

“Wow eomma! This is a lot.”

“Nothing-nothing, it’s only ban chan. Take a sit and we can start our dinner.”

They all eats and maybe because Jinyoung rarely had homemade food, he really enjoy the dinner.

“So, are you staying here for good or?” Mr Park

“I don’t know yet appa, I am just finishing my leave. I have tons of leave and before the year end I need to finished it so I decide to come back home.”

“I see, how many days you have?” Mrs Park

“14 days.”

“Oh my god, you never take any leave before?” Mrs Park

“I didn’t need too.”

“Oh.. You need to stay healthy okay? You are far away from us. I am worried.” Mrs Park

“You don’t need to be worry eomma, I am fine. And you also need to stop bothering Jaebeom shi. Poor him need to listen to your complain.”

“Eh? You meet with Jaebeom? When?” Mr Park

“I was urm accidentally saw his shop and met him there.”

“I see, is the kid with him?” Mr Park

“Yes, they are.”

“Cute kids. I wonder when will we get a grandchild, right darling?” Mrs Park

“Eomma, stop please. I am still young.”

“You are the same age with Jaebeom right?” Mr Park

Jinyoung just nod.

“He is the same age as you but he look so much mature. Older too. Maybe the stress of raising the kids alone get into him.” Mr Park

“Excuse me? What? He raise the kids alone?”

“Yup, since his husband died because of cancer last year.” Mrs Park

“Oh, I didn’t know that.”

“Yeah, poor Jaebeom. That kid is really have some bad lucks. With abusive father and now this.”

“Wait? Abusive parents? Really?”

“Yeah, we didn’t know it too but when he was 19, his father were heavily beaten him and the neighbour have to call the police because the sound of Jaebeom asking for help continue until late at night. Poor them, his father not like that before but after his mom death, he changes. But Jaebeom keep being with his father, even asking police not to arrest him. He keep taking care of him until his father died a few years back.” Mrs Park

Jinyoung never thought Jaebeom is in an abusive situation because he look so normal. When sometime he didn’t come to school and come with a full body covered but no one suspect anything at all.

“Luckily there is Youngjae right? Yoo Youngjae, you remember him?” Mrs Park

Yoo Youngjae? Sound familiar. Oh wait, is that one of the bad boy?

Yoo Youngjae is the guy who always skip class or even if he is in the class he just sleep. A rebel student.

“Yoo Youngjae? He is the delinquent right?”

“Ha ha ha, yes I remember him as the naughty kid but Jaebeom change him. I mean do you know they were neighbour? Both of them live at the same apartment complex and it’s because of Youngjae who just ignore his own parents and call the police. All the neighbour heard him but they are just afraid or being oblivious.” Mr Park

“Both of them like the fated pair right darling? Both found each other at their bad time and both trying the best for each other. I hope you can see the way Youngjae look at Jaebeom. It’s the pure love that even the town people here is fine with them. They are so nice. Work so hard that they bought a few square of lands and turn in into farming. The land soil is really fertile and they can support their family with only doing farming. It’s sad because both of them can’t continue study with how poor they are at that time but lucks turn out not so bad after they adopted the young and sweet Youngjae, yes the baby have the same name with his father. Since the adoption, their life has prosper. Jaebeom decided to learn more things about farming and everything turn just fine. They even decided to adopt another baby. But they both fall in love with Bambam and Yugyeom so they decided to take both of them. It’s easier this time because they really stable in financial too. It was really happy for them. But then, fate once again change everything when Youngjae is diagnosed with liver cancer. He just survived for 2 months only and on his last day he say sorry at Jaebeom because he leave him alone with the kids. Me and your appa are there. We are both so sorry for him.” Mrs Park

“That is why we are trying to find someone for Jaebeom but that guy is really hard headed. We try to match him but he just ignore us.” Mr Park.

“Yah, why are you doing that? Don’t butt into other people live.”

“But we promise Youngjae to help Jaebeom after his death. We need to help our neighbour, right darling?” Mrs Park

“Neighbour?”

Before Jinyoung continue his question there is a loud screaming “We are here halmeoni and harabeoji!. Open the door.” and also the knock from outside.

“Ahhh, they are here.” Mr Park said and get up and went to the main door.

Jinyoung look at his mother with questioning look. Mrs Park just smile sheepishly.

“Halmeonie! Gyeommie bring your favourite strawber—ry . Appa the sam guy is here too. Is he staking?” Yugyeom

“Stalking Gyeom ah, and he is not a stalker. Let’s meet him eh?” Jaebeom said then bring his son toward Jinyoung.

“Hi! We are your neighbour!.” Youngjae

“We love the halmeoni and harabeoji.” Bambam

“You are not welcome!.” Yugyeom.

What the hell?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading.
> 
> You can reach me out at [CC](https://curiouscat.qa/WonderfulAhgase) & or at [Twitter](https://twitter.com/wonderfuljjp)


	2. Chapter 2

“KIM YUGYEOM!” Jaebeom took his son and make him bow to Jinyoung. “I am so sorry, I don’t know where he got that.”

“He watch the drama with halmeoni, and the male lead said that to the bad guy who want to tease his love interest.” Youngjae

“Oh my, no wonder it sound familiar.” Mrs Park

“Halmeoni, after this make sure you watch something decent, our Yugyeommie is just a kid.” Mr Park

“I am so sorry Jaebeom, I didn’t realize it. He is that smart huh?” Mrs Park

“No worries, urm sorry again Jinyoung shi, this is my sons. Kids introduce yourself please.”

“Hi! My name is Choi Youngjae, I am just turn 8 years old last month. The first son, my dad and appa said I am like a sunshine to their life.”

Youngjae bow and flashes a smile.

“Aigoo our Youngjae really good with word.” Mrs Park

“Of course! Harabeoji teach me a lots of words.” Youngjae said then throws a little finger heart at Mr Park.

“Oh my heart,” Mr Park said and acting like he was shot by Youngjae.

“Now your turn, Bammie ah…” Jaebeom

“Urmm, hello. My real name is hard to pronounce because I no korean. But my appa call me as Bammie which I don’t really like so you can call me Bambam. I am urmm, 5? 6?... Appa how many years I am?” Bambam turn to Jaebeom with his frown face.

“You just turn 6 last week, so you are now 6 years old.” Jaebeom

“Ahh yes, last week we cut cake but I forgot. I am 6 same age with Yugyeom.” Bambam said then pull Yugyeom toward him.

“Yah, get away.” Yugyeom try to get away from Bambam.

“Okay enough both of you. Yugyeom introduce yourself.”

“Name Kim Yugyeom, my appa said I am a brat sometimes but he love me the most.” Yugyeom

“Nuh-uh, appa love me the most.” Youngjae

“You guys are wrong, appa love me the strong.” Bambam

“No, you are the naughty one.” Youngjae

“Okay boys, I love you the same. No more no less.. My favourite one is all of you. Okay? Now we need to go, we are just here to introduce the kids to Jinyoung shi here.” Jaebeom

“Ahh, it’s my turn then…Urm hi kids, I am Jinyoung hyung.” Jinyoung

“The Park Jinyoung like halmeoni always talk about?” Bambam

“Bambam please respect your elder, he is as old as me.” Jaebeom butt in because he don’t want his kid become rude.

“Ah sorry, Jinyoung hyung…” Bambam

“Nah it’s fine. I am happy to meet you.” Jinyoung

“Us too! Hope we can play together next time, it’s already dark so we need to sleep. Right appa?” Yougjae

“Yes Youngjae, you are very smart, now boys say your goodbye and goodnight.” Jaebeom

The three of them talk simultaneously that even Jinyoung can’t understand what they said so he just nods and wave goodbye to the family.

“Aish, what a cute kids. I wish they will find happiness soon.” Mrs Park

“But they look happy?” Jinyoung

“Yes they are and it’s all because of Jaebeom. He try so hard to not make his son missing their dad so much that sometime he even neglect his own happiness.” Mrs Park solemnly answer.

Jinyoung went to sleep and for the first time ever he dream about the time he was a high schooler. Only in this dream he is brave enough to confessed to Jaebeom and they become a couple which lead them to have a family. Jaebeom’s kids is also his kid and he was happy in the dream but suddenly there is dark shadow and then he awake.

“What a dream.”

Jinyoung second day is spent by helping his mother sort out his old things, there a few things that he want to donate and a few thing he want to throw away. He was looking round his high school box and then his mother asking him why there is a lot of melon bread plastic wrapper and also a lot of candy wrappers.

“This is all a trash, you should get rid of it earlier. This will attract rats you know.”

“Wait eomma, you don’t have to do that, just give it back.”

“Why?”

“Just because. Give it back, please.”

“I wonder who give this to you that you still keep the plastic wrapper. Your crush?”

Jinyoung choked on his own saliva then jokingly glaring at his mother.

“Eomma! What even? I don’t have a crush.”

“Ha ha ha, yeah right. Whatever. I know you come here because of your break up with Hyunwoo right? I am waiting for you to tell me but I guess I am not that important for you to let me know the news.”

“I am sorry eomma, it’s not like I want to keep it a secret but I know you adore him but I just can’t with him anymore.”

“Well I do adore him but I love you more, you are my son. So I don’t care even if you ended things with him.”

“Thanks eomma, I am glad I have mother figure like you.”

“I carry you for almost 10 months, I don’t need you to loathe me just because you prefer to be with guy. I love you right?” Mrs Park then hug Jinyoung and cupped his face. “ I just want to be happy.”

“I will, eomma. One day.”

“Good, now you continue sorting this whatever things here. I need to get ready.”

“You going somewhere?”

“I promise Jaebeom to look after his shop for a while, his other worker apparently have something to do and he can’t close the shop because today is the day when a lot of his supplier come to collect their stock.”

“He going somewhere?”

“Well today is the 7th of July, his husband death anniversary. He will took the kids to visit their father grave.”

“I see.”

Jinyoung still looking at the plastic wrapper that he has safely keeps for all the years. All of this snacks is given by no other than his crush. Jaebeom are not his friend or clique but then at some point they always accidentally bump into each other or ended up need to do something with each other. And whenever they finished doing their chores Jaebeom will never missed give Jinyoung some snacks to fill up his energy.

Jinyoung will always grateful for that and sometimes it’s make Jinyoung feel special because he notice that Jaebeom only give him the snack and no other person received it like him.

This always make Jinyoung feel giddy and his little mind at that time will thought that Jaebeom has feeling for him but all that is only just his imagination.

Jinyoung took one candy wrapper and suddenly he remind of Jaebeom’s smile whenever Jaebeom give it to him.

Jinyoung still thinks how will it turn if he confessed to Jaebeom, what will happen.

No Park Jinyoung, that is the past. No need to think about it anymore. Now, now is the future. In this future, he now knows that Jaebeom like guy too. Same like him, well Jaebeom already have 3 kids with his husband. He is married with a guy. A guy who Jinyoung knows very well as the bad guy but after what his parent told him last night. Jinyoung was kind of surprise because he never thought that that Yoo Youngjae will change.

Yoo Youngjae mostly famous because he like to brawl with anyone who crosses him. Even if someone accidentally bump into him Youngjae will make sure he will retort in one way or another. Everyone will avoid him, oh wait, not everyone. How would Jinyoung forget? Jinyoung once saw how Jaebeom try to approach Youngjae but the other guy just ignore him. Jaebeom is a friendly guy, voted as the vice president. Jaebeom like to help other so no wonder why he is the only one who willingly to talk with the delinquent Youngjae.

Or maybe Jaebeom already has feeling for Youngjae since way before and the reason he try to involve Youngjae with anything related to school activities.

There is the possibility for that to happen.

Oh wait.

Why did Jinyoung think about Jaebeom’s past relationship? The man already married.

Yes, but his husband is dead.

Yeah, so what?

Maybe this is the time for you to try and court him?

Wait, why?

Because duh, you still have feeling for him. Maybe you don’t want to admit but I am really sure that the reason you can’t be in a relationship is because of one guy name Lim Jaebeom. I know it because I am you. You still can’t forget about him, right? You think staying away from Jaebeom will make you forget him but now look what it do? You come back here and the first thing you do is see his face but luckily at the same day you found out he is gay and single.

I don’t know if he is single or not.

That man are so busy with his work and kids. Eomma and appa will definitely inform us if he is in relationship. Last night eomma wish that he found someone or something right? I am sure he is single.

I still don’t know why I have this conversation with my unconscious mind.

Because you wanted Lim Jaebeom and I am trying to help you get him!

Jinyoung shakes his head, this is bad. He thought that his teenage crush for Jaebeom is gone. It’s just a crush, why he can’t stop thinking about what it?

Jaebeom arrived at the graveyard with 3 little loud boys following him.

“Hyung! You should take this, it’s heavy for me.” Bambam

“I already have lots of things, you just need to bring one bottle of orange juice, why are you complaining?” Youngjae

“Yeah, look I have to bring melon bread, raisin bread and also strawberry sandwich.” Yugyeom

“It’s not as heavy as my bottle! You don’t know how hurt my hand is.” Bambam

“Bammie ah, don’t be like that. You want to see daddy right? He will be sad if he saw his son sulking and making sour face like you do. Is it really hard for you? I can help you carry it?” Jaebeom

“Urmm, it’s not that bad, you already have lots to bring. Basket full of foods, the thing we sit on and also umbrella if it’s rain. It’s fine appa. I am strong.” Bambam

“I know it, our Bammie are strong, that is why I give you this bottle.”

Jaebeom whisper to Bambam, if he talk out loud Yugyeom might be upset because of it.

“Of course! Come on! Daddy already wait for us.” Bambam

They arrived just a few minutes later, Jaebeom were arranging the foods and things that he bring meanwhile the kids keep talking and pull out some dead weeds. Jaebeom just smile looking at his kids. Yes, they was still little when his husband died. But Jaebeom still remember that it’s hard to bring Youngjae back home because he wanted to be with his father. Both Yugyeom and Bambam are just whining and crying while being held by Jackson and Mark.

It’s took some time to calm Youngjae and lots of promises until Youngjae finally relent and went pliant. Jaebeom never lied to his kids. He already told them the real things when Youngjae fall sick, that one day their father will be gone. But facing this in real life is hard, for earlier days the kids keep whining and asking for their father. Luckily he has Mark and Jackson to accompany him and sometime the Park come by just to look after the kid.

Now, everything is turning to be normal. It’s been a year. Yugyeom and Bambam doesn’t cry at night asking for their father as often as before. Youngjae has been an angel, he understand things and act like the older brother. He never throws tantrums but sometime Jaebeom saw how he draws his father and also write how he missed him. That is why every night, after checking in the youngest kid. He will lay down beside Youngjae and shows him how both Jaebeom and Youngjae love him. Jaebeom always ask Youngjae to tell him what he feels and Youngjae will told him the truth. Sometime he is tired with his brother, sometime he is tired with Jaebeom but he always told Jaebeom how he missed his father. Jaebeom always try to make Youngjae feel better before he sleep.

Jaebeom doing the best he can for his kids.

“Appa!! Why are you crying? We promise we will not cry in front of daddy! You broke the promise!” Youngjae

“Yes, appa say to us no cry. I don’t cry. Yugy don’t cry even cry baby Youngjae hyung don’t cry.” Bambam

Yugyeom just nods his head.

“I am sorry, I don’t realize it. I just happy, this is a happy cry! I am not sad, I swear!.” Jaebeom

“Happy tears exist?” Youngjae

“Of course darling. Like the time I get married with your daddy. I am crying like a messed but it’s a happy tears. You saw the video right?” Jaebeom

“Yeah daddy laugh at you.” Bambam

“Yes and all the time me and your daddy pick you guys for adoption, I cry. You remember Youngjae? The day I took you to pick Yugyeom and Bambam? I cry right?” Jaebeom

“I think you do, I don’t remember. Sorry.” Youngjae

“No it’s fine. The conclusion is, I cry because I am so happy we can be with daddy now. Daddy must be proud of you guys. Youngjae already so good at doing his own homework and chores. He knows how to tie his own shoelaces now. A very good boy. Bambam is also become bigger and taller, he is a little bit naughty teasing his brothers but it’s all because of love. He is good at reading too. Same as Yugyeom. Both of them growing so fast that I just want them to stop growing. Yugyeom is now love to dance and sing. He love watching your old dancing video and try to copy you. One thing that you will not be proud is both of them still can’t eat veggies. So sad. They always hide or throw away the veggies. What to do daddy? Appa just want them to grow as strong as you and Youngjae hyung but looks like they will not be like you guys.” Jaebeom

“No, no. I eat veggies, yesterday I eat this one carrot and even I don’t like the taste. I swallowed” Yugyeom

“Me too, I eat one too. Daddy I promise to eat veggies for now.” Bambam

“Me too.” Yugyeom

Jaebeom try to hide his chuckling.

“Wait daddy said something!”

Jaebeom act like he was listening and put his ear closer to the grave.

“He said he is proud for you and happy that you guys come visit him! He loves you and wish that you guys always be happy!.”Jaebeom

The kids squeal and simultaneously shouting at the same time that Jaebeom don’t even understand what they talk about. He just watch the kids tell a lot of different story at the same time. Jaebeom is proud and a little bit sad.

He wanted to be old with Youngjae, do crazy things with him, go on vacation like they used to before they adopted the kids. Just Yougjae hold him after the tiring day, Youngjae peppering Jaebeom with kisses to his neck that always make him giggle.

Jaebeom misses his husband.

Jaebeom then try to cover the tears from the kids and turn around but the he was surprise seeing Jinyoung with a bouquet of flowers.

“Sorry… Eomma told me you are here, I just want to say my greetings.” Jinyoung

Jaebeom just smile.

Jinyoung then put the flower and pray. After he pray he bow. Jaebeom just look at Jinyoung, even the weather quite cold but he feel his heart become warmer seeing the scene.

“Jinyoung hyung! So you also go to school with appa and daddy?”

Youngjae ask when they are on the way to the parking lots.

“Yes I am.” Jinyoung

“How was appa and daddy at school? Are they cool? Are they famous?” Youngjae.

“Choi Youngjae, don’t bother Jinyoung shi please.” Jaebeom

“You can just call me Jinyoung you know? Why so formal. We used to be friend right?” Jinyoung

“Sorry, it’s just a habit. I have a lots of customer I don’t want to sound rude so I always be formal to them. Sorry.” Jaebeom

“Nah, it’s fine. I feel old when you call me like that.” Jinyoung

Jaebeom just laugh.

“Hyung! Answer my question please.” Youngjae

“Oh sorry, hmm what should I say? Your appa is really famous and kind, you daddy in other hand was like..urm cool too?” Jinyoung said after Jaebeom mouth at him asking to not tell the truth.

“Waaah really? So they like the famous school couple?” Youngjae

“No way, Jackson appa said that him and Mark appa were the famous couple? Right Bam?” Yugyeom

“I told you right, appa and daddy found each other after school. You forget already?” Jaebeom

“Yes I forgot, sorry.” Youngjae

“It’s fine.” Jaebeom

“Daddy say appa like someone else at the school right? I don’t know who he is but it’s make daddy jealous.” Youngjae

“Yah stop talking. Sorry Jinyoung, they are just kids spouting nonsense.” Jaebeom nervously chuckle.

“Ha ha ha, no worries.” Jinyoung

Jinyoung sigh a little bit when they arrived at the parking lots.

“Thanks for helping me. Sorry if my son keep bothering you by asking to play with them.” Jaebeom

“It’s fine.” Jinyoung

“Well we take the leave first. Thank you again for visiting.” Jaebeom

Jinyoung just bow and watch them go.

So Jaebeom has his love interest at high school?

Interesting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for the late update, I was so upset because my twitter acc for socmed au and my main acc Twitter has been R worded so I have lost all my socmed au. I decided to not do anymore socmed au (until i get my old acc) because I was devastated to lost the story that I have wrote before. I am so sorry for you guys who waiting for my socmed au update for Please Be My Baby (I will discontinued this socmed au and maybe will write ao3 vers of this story).
> 
> Thank you to you guys who supported my socmed au and this fanfic. I appreciate it so much.
> 
> This story is still on going don't worry I will not discontinued writing jpp because I love them and I love writing story about them. You guys can just comment here if you want to talk to me. Sorry again...
> 
> Hope you enjoy this story and have a nice day.


	3. Chapter 3

“Appa! Appa! Look at what Gyeom do to my toys.” Bambam come running into the Jaebeom’s room with a broken toys.

Jaebeom who are just awake groans a little.

“I told you it was an accident! You don’t have to wake appa because of these things.”

Yugyeom who are frustrated cry.

Jaebeom look at the watch and it was 7.30 am.

“Boys, this early? Come here both of you. Why are you two awake?” Jaebeom

Yugyeom who just running and hides himself next to Jaebeom, still crying. Meanwhile Bambam feel a little bit guilty for making his brother crying just fidgetly standing.

“Bammie? Why?” Jaebeom

“Urmm, Yugy still sleep but I am bored so I wake him up by tickling him with the toy but he was still sleepy and accidentally throws the toy away and it’s broke.” Bambam

“So why did you tell me he is the one who did it?” Jaebeom

“Sorry, it’s just I dream daddy and when I wake daddy is gone so I don’t know.” Bambam

“Bammie come here.” Jaebeom

Bambam slowly walk toward Jaebeom and sit next to Jaebeom’s right side.

“Gyeommie, Bammie are sorry for what he did, you can stop cry now right?” Jaebeom

Yugyeom just sniffles and there is no tears forming,

“Good boy and Bammie? You missed daddy? Appa too.. How about we try to sleep more? Sleep here with appa and maybe we can dream of daddy together? I want to see daddy too.” Jaebeom

“Really? But Gyeommie will cry again, I’m big already. I dream daddy and didn’t see him but I no cry.” Bambam

“Aww both of you! Stop growing!!.” Jaebeom

Then the door open revealing disheveled looking Youngjae

“Appa the youngest are missing. Oh there they are.”

Youngjae then come and lay next to Bambam.

“Why are they here appa?” Youngjae

“They just missed daddy, me too. That is why we sleep in today.” Jaebeom

“You close the shop today?” Youngjae

“No but the workers will open it for us. I am quite tired. Need to rest more.” Jaebeom

“Okay, let’s sleep.” Youngjae.

Jinyoung coming to get breakfast when he notice a few packed food.

“Are you going somewhere?” Jaebeom

“No honey, I just packed a few breakfast for the kids and Jaebeom. Their cars still there so they are not going to the shop yet. Jaebeom might be tired after yesterday’s emotion.” Mrs Park

“I bet.” Jinyoung said then eat one of the mini kimchi pancake.

Jinyoung also can’t sleep, he keep repeating Youngjae’s word about Jaebeom love interest and now he is curious on who is that person is. This is bad, Jinyoung keep thinking about Jaebeom even when they just meet 3 days ago.

“Oh lord, I forgot I have an appointment at the beauty saloon another 20 minutes, I didn’t get ready yet. Jinyoung be a dear please and bring this packed food to the house next door please?” Mrs Park

“Okay.” Jinyoung

Jinyoung already push the bell for second time now but no one answer. Should he just go and put the food on the porch? Jinyoung afraid that Jaebeom will not realize about the food and the food will be ruin. Jinyoung decided to just go back home and try again later.

But the time Jinyoung decided to turn around the door open and display the sleepy Jaebeom who just scratching his head with only white tank and black boxer.

“Yes?” Jaebeom’s eyes is half open.

“Hi? Eomma give you breakfast.” Jinyoung

“Oh my god! Sorry!” Jaebeom close the door and Jinyoung can hear Jaebeom are searching for something, Jinyoung just chuckle.

Jaebeom open the door back a few minute later. He look decent now with a robe.

“Sorry, I thought I am decent.” Jaebeom

“Nah it’s fine. Your body is hot.” Jinyoung

Shit, what did I just say?

“No I mean today is hot? The weather? I am sorry but I was shocked looking at your body, with the way you always styling like an old man I didn’t realize it. It was a praise.” Jinyoung

“Are you calling me old?” Jaebeom sound really upset.

“No I am not! I was just…should stop talking now. Here is your food.” Jinyoung

“Ha ha ha , sorry just kidding. This is a lot, are you in a hurry?” Jaebeom

Jinyoung shake his head.

“I have some extra fruit yogurt that I made 2 days ago. I really want to go and sent to your house but busy busy busy that I forget, if you don’t mind will you wait for a while? I just need to pack it.” Jaebeom

“Yes, I am free.” Jinyoung

“Thank god, please come inside.” Jaebeom

“What?” Jinyoung

“Do you prefer to stay here? Outside?” Jaebeom

Wait, wait. Lim Jaebeom invited me to come inside his house. I never went to his house ever. Can I trust myself to come inside and being alone with Jaebeom?

“What are you doing appa?” Youngjae yawning and hug Jaebeom’s leg.

Hah, I forgot Jaebeom are with his son. Why am I so nervous?

“Yes of course I can come inside if you don’t mind. Good Morning Youngjae!.” Jinyoung cheerfully said.

“Urgh why so loud?” Youngjae

“Youngjae! Sorry and by the way I wouldn’t invite you if I don’t like it. You are my friend. Come in” Jaebeom open the door wider and smile at Jinyoung.

“Thank you.”

Jinyoung come inside and look around. It’s look super cozy and tidy. Jinyoung thought a household with a child will be messy and full of toys. Jaebeom house is just a simple decoration. A few picture frame. His wedding day, picture of him and baby Youngjae. Picture of him and the kids. Jinyoung feels so warm looking into the picture. Jaebeom smile is so wide and genuine.

“Here you go, please say thank you to Mrs Park.” Jaebeom

“Okay, thanks. By the way the picture is so pretty.” Jinyoung

Especially you.

“Thank you. It’s just a picture of our little family but I feel so happy seeing it that is why my husband and I decided to frame our favourite picture.” Jaebeom

“Sorry to say this but are you still coping with your husband death?” Jinyoung

“Well kind of, but not as bad as before. You lost the only support system you have for almost 10 years. Because of the way his lifestyle before. He used to be a smoker since he was 15. Just imagine how hard I try to stop him but luckily he stop it after we get married but still because of heavy smoking. I lost him.” Jaebeom clears his throat. “ But no worry, I am fine. I have my kids here. It’s tiring but with them around my mind are not always about my husband.”

Jinyoung can see Jaebeom’s sorrowful smile, Jinyoung wanted to do something to help Jaebeom with his sorrow heart but then Jinyoung are not that close to him so to avoid from having awkward moment with Jaebeom, Jinyoung just bow to him and go back.

Jinyoung is a mess, he will admit it. Ever since he saw Jaebeom at the shop his mind keep thinking about ways to flirt with a straight guy but then Jaebeom is gay but by the look of it he still so in love with his late husband. Jinyoung sometime before his sleep he will think about many what if.

What if he is brave enough to confessed to Jaebeom when they were still a highschooler.

What if Jinyoung never moved out from this town, maybe he is the one who safe Jaebeom from his abusive father.

What if Jinyoung never have crush for Jaebeom. Because that little crush has bloom into love in everytime Jinyoung meet Jaebeom.

Jinyoung still did not regret about how his life turn because he knows everything that happen have meaning. Maybe if they were a couple in high school, they will date briefly until Jinyoung move away? Because Jinyoung never saw his future in this small town. The town is just fine but Jinyoung had a dream to study at a university so he can find a great job with big great pay job to help his parent. This small town does not have any facilities other that kindergarten, middle and high school.

He is happy with his lifestyle now. He can give to his parent 00000 every month to help with their living expenses.

But for his love life? He is kind of not in the game yet. Every guy he dated lacks of something. Jinyoung is not choosy but he wanted some connection with his love one which he rarely have even when the said boyfriend is a 10.

There is something that always make Jinyoung think twice, but now his mind are playing some tricks. Because even when Jinyoung doesn’t know Jaebeom is gay he just wanted Jaebeom after he only saw glimpse of him.

The guy who have his heart since he was 15. Jaebeom didn’t do much to make Jinyoung sway for him. Jaebeom just help Jinyoung doing his last minute science project which the basic things he do but at that time Jinyoung felt like Jaebeom help him a lot.

And the feeling grow, it doesn’t help when Jaebeom is the kind of person who always friendly. Keep asking Jinyoung if his day is okay or not. Jinyoung always the popular one among the student with his looks, grade and sport. But because of his realization as early as 13 that he like boys, Jinyoung is kind of preserve student. He just do what he like and go back home.

Meanwhile Jaebeom is the kind of student who are always involve in any activity (he is the vice president) and love to help whoever are in need. Hence the reason Jinyoung still having crush with Jaebeom even when it’s been 12 years since he moved to Seoul.

The next day….

Jaebeom already ready to go to the shop when Bambam come running and crying.

“Hey Bammie? What happen?”

“I don’t want to stay at home! I want to follow appa.”

“But darling, if you follow me now you will be bored. Today I have lots of things to do and everyone at the shop will be busy and no one to attend to you. Here you can play with your hyung and Yugyeom? Then Lisa will come to look at you guys? She will come after another 10 minutes. Is it fine with you?”

Bambam sobs.

“But I want you.” Bambam

“Oh darling, okay let me give you a hug.”

Jaebeom engulf Bambam in a hug and lightly stroke his back. Bambam is the one who is the most spoiled among the siblings. Youngjae used to give in with whatever antics Bambam do. Well Youngjae is the one who have more patience that Jaebeom. That is why his kids really loved their daddy.

“Are you feeling better?” Jaebeom

Bambam nods.

“Good, how about this. I let you eat 2 cookies and you wait Lisa while watching your favourite video?” Jaebeom

Bambamg nods again but with a huge grin.

“Cool then.” Jaebeom

Jaebeom arrived at the shop and he is thankful for his workers when half of the jobs are done. He just need to sign a few things and sorted some document at his office. So he was focusing with his works when he heard a familiar yelling from outside.

Jaebeom just smile. He knows that voice.

“Jaebeom~~”

Jackson come inside Jaebeom’s office with huge smile.

“Hey Jacks, what are you doing here?”

“Oh do I need a reason to come here?”

“You should because this is still office hours no?”

“Jaebeom! It’s 8.00 pm now! Urgh no wonder Mark said you are not home yet.”

“8 already? Oh my god, I lost track of time. Wait we closed at 7 so how can you come inside?”

“One of the worker are still in the front and I ask her to open for me.”

“I see, are you come here just to see me after your work? I am touched.”

“Yeah, yeah whatever. I just want to let you know that ehem, I found someone for you!.”

“Someone? For me? For what?”

“Aish! I told you, I was trying to find the kids new daddy and a daddy for you too.”

“No stop it, I told you I’m not interested.”

“Urgh until when? You know it’s been a year right?”

“Yes that is why! It’s only been a year and now you want me to mingle?”

“Jaebeom, if not now when?”

“ I already on my 30 and have not only 1 child but 3. I don’t think a lot of people wanted to be with me.”

“You are only 30!! Still young and we can find someone who will like the kids and vice versa. I mean, enjoy your single life?”

“You know it’s not my choice to be single right? I love my husband.”

“Your late husband, Jaebeom since Youngjae passed away, you never enjoy your life. You keep working and taking care of your child.”

“That is because I am the only one they have, I love taking care of my kids.”

“I know, I love them too but how about you try going out once?”

“I always went out with you?”

“Yeah, me and Mark are not going to count here. We are your designated best friend. What I mean is go out with some hottie or some oldie or someone!”

“I don’t know…I mean I don’t have time to think about that. You know?”

“Stop, I don’t want to hear your reason. Tomorrow at 7.30 wait outside your shop.”

“What for?”

Jackson just grinning.

“You will see.”

“I hate this.”

“Now come on, I want to see my child.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi again! 
> 
> Hope you will like the new update! Do share with me your thought about this story for now!
> 
> Thank You for reading!
> 
> Have a nice day!


	4. Chapter 4

Jinyoung just enjoying the night view at his parent's porch when he saw Jaebeom’s car coming with another car behind. Jinyoung was confused, he thought Jaebeom already at home when he saw a car park inside Jaebeom’s house.

Who is?

Jinyoung who is curious are now peeking between the wood fence and see the guy who seems familiar just hugging Jaebeom after he get out from the car.

What the heck? Who is the guy?

Jinyoung suddenly went toward a small gate that connected from his house to Jaebeom’s and quickly open the gate.

His action make the guy who hug Jaebeom scream.

“Yah!!! Do you want to kill me?” Jackson

“Lord… Jinyoung? What? What can I help you?” Jaebeom try to control his laughter after seeing Jackson’s reaction.

“ I am so sorry.. I didn’t mean to scare you.” Jinyoung

“Wait, what do you call him? Jinyoung? Is this the Park Jinyoung who you li….”

Even before Jackson finished his words Jaebeom cover his mouth.

“Yes, he is Mrs Park son who just here to visit his parents. Nothing else.” Jaebeom said then whisper something to Jackson.

Jackson then giddily smirking at Jaebeom then to Jinyoung.

“Hey! I don’t know if you remember me but I am Jackson Wang Tuan. I used to go to the same school with you too.” Jackson

“The sporty guys, it’s hard not to forget you when you keep trying to be in my team.” Jinyoung

“Ha ha ha still I don’t know why you didn’t accept me.” Jackson

“Yah, you are good with fencing and tracks things. You are so bad with any sport with ball.” Jaebeom

“I….ugh hate it when you say it like that. By the way it’s been a while since I saw you. Come inside, let’s talk.” Jackson

“Yah this is my house why are you freely invite other people? And it’s quite late. Don’t disturb people okay?” Jaebeom

“What? He is still here so that’s mean it’s not that late. I know you have kids and always sleep at 9pm but please we are still young. Live a little.” Jackson

“Whatever, Jinyoung you can just ignore this over hyper grown man.” Jaebeom

Jinyoung just laugh.

“I am intrigue by your invitation but it’s late for me too so nice meeting you Jackson, I will go back now.” Jinyoung

“Okay man, now don’t be a stranger! Let’s meet! We can talk and eat but not tomorrow. Tomorrow someone need go on a date.” Jackson said while wiggling his brow at Jaebeom.

“Stop talking! Bye now.”

Jaebeom said then pull Jackson away from Jinyoung.

“Bye.” Jinyoung confused for a while then went inside his house.

Jinyoung just realize something when he was ready to sleep.

What the fuck?

“Lim Jaebeom!! Why you didn’t tell me about this?” Jackson straightaway interrogate Jaebeom when both of them walk inside the house.

“Tell you about what?”

Mark come while holding the sleepy Bambam with his hairs up that show his cute forehead.

“Ohh my baby.” Jackson squealed.

Jackson then take Bambam from Mark and try to make him sleep.

“He can’t sleep? What about the other?”

“He is so excited about me being here and was fighting with his sleepiness. The other already give up and sleep soundly.” Mark

“Thank you Mark, I seriously forget about the timing whenever I focus on working.”

“I know and it’s bad for your health. I bet you didn’t eat dinner yet.” Mark

“Yup but your husband already feed me foods while arranging about tomorrow. Do you aware about his plan?”

“I do and I don’t want to stop him. I actually support him and kinda surprised by myself. Usually I don’t like his little plan but you do need someone to help you with the kids and so on.” Mark

“That is the problem, I don’t want to be with someone just for my children. Like I have baby sitter for ny child.”

“That is not my point and I just realize how it’s sound just now. No, what I mean is you need to found someone for your own good. Somebody to rely on when you are so stressed. Somebody who can be your next Youngjae? I know you love him so much but I was there when he ask you to move on and find your happiness after his death? He knows you so well that even after he told you he ask me to make sure you do what he want. He want you to be happy. That is all.” Mark

“But I am happy.”

“No you are not, you are just being strong by keep smiling and laughing in front of your kids. You don’t realize that your smile doesn’t reach your eyes like they used too.” Mark

Jaebeom just standing there and being silent.

“It’s showing huh?”

Jaebeom plop to the sofa.

“You can fool the kids but not us.” Mark

“But how? Like I don’t know if I can fall in love again.” Jaebeom sigh.

“What if you fall for your old crush who are now is your neighbour.” Jackson said then sit next to Mark

“Wait. What now?”

“You know how Jaebeom have this crush with Jinyoung the basketball captain and how I always ask him to just tell Jinyoung?” Jackson

“Yeah, I remember that but isn't it just a crush?” Mark

“Yeah just a crush, Jaebeom literally love that guy that he even do extra work so he can be with Jinyoung.” Jackson

“Yah stop it Jackson.”

“I am still mad that he didn’t even tell Jinyoung about it, like even before Jinyoung move away.” Jackson

“Jackson!!!!” Jaebeom desperately scream and try to hit Jackson.

“Okay, okay. Stop both of you. The kids are sleeping right now. But if you don’t mind Jaebeom, tell me why you didn’t confessed? I mean you are usually the brave one.” Mark

“Hey I don’t even know he is gay okay?”

“Bullshit, he like you. Believe me.” Jackson

“I really don’t know that and you know how he is always alone? Like I don’t even know how to be friend with him? I try hard okay. I always ask him to help me even when I don’t need his help at all. But he just never want to be my friend I think?”

“Yeobo why do you think that Jinyoung like Jaebeom?” Mark

“Because he always staring at Jaebeom and the way his eye shine when he see Jaebeom, like our Jaebeom have safe his life or some.” Jackson

“You just exaggerate. Now can we just stop talking about my old crush? Or I will not going out with whoever you want to introduce me with.”

“Hey who did you have in mind huh? Please don’t be someone creepy.” Mark

“Yah we are friend with the same circle okay, he is my friend’s friend not someone creepy.” Jackson

“Yeah right…” Mark

“Whatever. So I it’s just me and that guy? It’s a guy right?”

Jackson gasp scandalously.

“Yah who do you thin I am? I will never introduce a gay man to a women.” Jackson

“I am just kidding. Now both of you should go now. It’s late already.”

“Just say you want to chase us out.” Jackson

“Yes please do so.”

“Jaebeom, tomorrow at 7 okay. Just wait at your shop.” Jackson

“Okay!.” Jaebeom said and ushered both of Mark and Jackson to the front door.

Jaebeom just sigh after he finished washing himself and look at the mirror.

“You can do this, it’s easy. Just like seeing new friend!”

Jaebeom try to calm himself. He never went out on a date with anyone other than Youngjae. Youngjae has been occupied his love life since he was 19. Even when it was hard to forget about Jinyoung that time because Jinyoung suddenly left the town without any words when they finished high school. Youngjae has trying his best to court Jaebeom after they become friend after Youngjae save him from his father.

Youngjae at first are not someone who have romantic bones inside his body, after they date for 2 years then he turn into sappy romantic fella. They married just after their 3rd years anniversaries together. Since then, they never separated, they live as happy as they can be. Just the two of them until they decided to adopt their sons.

Jaebeom shake his head from reminiscing the past.

He need to move on.

For the sake of his son and his husband last wish.

Jaebeom hope he can found someone who he can love.

Jinyoung can’t sleep.

He try but sleep never come. He is still bothered by Jackson’s words. If he heard correctly, Jaebeom will have a date tomorrow.

Jinyoung are still pondering whether to court his old crush meanwhile the said crush are having a date tomorrow.

Is this déjà vu?

Where Jinyoung might lose Jaebeom again (even when he is not Jinyoung’s at the first), Jinyoung felt like he need to do something but at the same time his heart are not sure if his feeling for Jaebeom still there or it’s just a nostalgic feeling after seeing his old crush.

Jinyoung’s suddenly wanted to kill his own thought.

He can’t sleep after knowing about Jaebeom’s date is the sign of Jinyoung is jealous. What else does Jinyoung want? Jinyoung knows that Jaebeom is the one since way before and now when the guy is single and ready to have new relationship, suddenly Jinyoung are not ready?

Bullshit.

Jinyoung are now having a headache because his own thoughts keep fighting each other.

Sleep please, Jinyoung beg and after another 30 mins he finally sleep.

Jinyoung are now at his old classroom, why is he here? He look around and all the other student are just chatting with each other and ignore hime. It’s normal then, nobody like to talk with him unless his basketball team mates.

Jinyoung walk out form the class, he really don’t know what to do. He is bored.

Jinyoung just walk around the school when he heard a loud laugh. A loud but beautiful laugh. He recognize the laugh and when he look back it was Jaebeom and Jackson. Jaebeom laughing so freely and beautifully. Occasionally hitting on Jackson arm.

Jackson then shout at him.

“Yah Jinyoung! Where are you going? Skipping class again?”

Jackson tease Jinyoung while walking toward him.

“Hey Jinyoung..” Jaebeom shyly smile at him.

“Hi.” Jinyoung shyly answered Jaebeom.

It’s always a little awkward whenever Jinyoung meet Jaebeom. He don’t even know why he feel like that.

“Where are you going?” Jaebeom

“No way. Just walking.” Jinyoung awkwardly gaze at his shoes.

“Ha ha ha, you so funny.” Jaebeom

“What funny? You are weird Jaebeom ah.” Jackson

“Shut up.” Jaebeom nudge Jackson.

“I urm, need to go?” Jinyoung

“Ah okay, sorry to bother you during your walking.” Jaebeom said then bow at Jinyoung.

Jaebeom took Jackson’s hand and bring him away from Jinyoung.

“That is weird.” Jinyoung said then walk.

Jinyoung don’t know how but then the scene are changing, now he is at he back of his school. He never go here because it’s a famous place for the deliquent to hang out. But now Jinyoung is here, he don’t know what to do.

Jinyoung wanted to walk away when he heard voices.

“Yah! You shouldn’t do that in here.”

Jinyoung knows that voice. It’s Jaebeom.

“Fuck off, will ya?”

Wait, who is that?

“Yoo Youngjae! You already had a red record of smoking and now you doing the same thing again?”

“Yeah, so what?”

“What if the teacher saw you?”

“There is none here unless you tell them? You are not like that right? Vice President?”

“Stop this please. Smoking are not healthy at all. What if in the future you get sick because of it.”

“Why do you care? It was my future not yours. Unless?”

Jinyoung can see Youngjae smirking at Jaebeom.

“I realize now you always tailgate me whenever I go. You like me that much huh?”

“No, I don’t, I just don’t want you to get in trouble and become a troublesome to the teacher.”

“Stop talking Jaebeom. I know you like me.”

Youngjae then hold Jaebeom’s chin and took him closer.

“You are so beautiful.”

“What? What are you talking about?”

“You have beautiful lips and it’s always look red and plumps.”

“Stop this.”

Jaebeom try to get away from Youngjae’s grasp.

“Not now, vice president. I really want to know how your lips taste like.”

“Hey stop now.” Jinyoung

Jinyoung shout but Youngjae just ignore him and kiss Jaebeom. Jinyoung then try to walk to them but the more he run the farther Youngjae and Jaebeom is until there is no way for Jinyoung to reach them.

Jinyoung then try to stop but he can’t control his leg. He keep running and running and running.

Jinyoung.

He heard someone calling his name.

Jinyoung.

Jinyoung?

Park Jinyoung! Wake up!

Jinyoung wake up after his mother shake him.

“What the? Hey are you okay? You scared me. You still asleep? It’s 2pm now.”

“What? 2pm? Shit, sorry eomma. I don’t intend to wake this late.”

“I was out with your father after leaving your breakfast and come back with the breakfast untouched. What happen?”

“Nothing eomma, just I can’t sleep yesterday.”

“Aww, you should tell me. Jaebeom has make this great teabag that always help me sleep better. If I know I could make you a cup of tea.”

“It’s fine eomma, nothing bad.”

“If you say so. I didn’t cook lunch today but I already buy you some bento, eat it while it’s still warm.”

“Okay eomma.”

“Jinyoung? Does something bothering you? I saw you kind off relentless since yesterday. Care to share?”

Jinyoung look at his mother and just nods.


	5. Chapter 5

Jaebeom keep glancing at his own phone because Jackson keep reminding him about the date. Jaebeom try to focus on his work but then he just can’t because his mind keep worrying about the date. Jackson already sent him the change of clothes for today and he keep wondering what underneath the black clothes cover

Jaebeom just shake his head and continue doing his work.

Jaebeom didn’t realize that the clock already turn to 5pm when he get the call from Jackson who urges him to get ready for his date.

Jaebeom just agree without any argument because he is that nervous. He open the cover and gasp because it was a really amazing black suit. The one that Jaebeom will never wear unless it was for some important occasion.

Now, Jaebeom are wondering if he will over dress for the date or the place of the date is so fancy that he need to wear suits.

This make Jaebeom feel more nervous. It’s been a while since Jaebeom went to a fancy restaurant. Not after they adopted the kids.

After the adoption a lot of their free time are for the kids. Jaebeom and Youngjae will make sure that the kids will received all their love and hoping that the kids will never feel left out. So both of them really loses time for a date night or any night being just the two of them.

But, it’s never make their relationship feel less loved.

Jaebeom favourite things to do is seeing his late husband playing with their kids or when he changes the diapers. It’s was so fun looking at Youngjae’s face whenever he need to change the diapers after one of the kids poop.

Youngjae is not a perfect dad but he try to be there for Jaebeom and the kids. With his temper record, Jaebeom was afraid a little if Youngjae might lose his patience with the kids but luckily he never loses it in front of the kids.

Whenever he get mad, he will get out of the kids eyesight and just let out a few steam by screaming towards inanimate object. It’s work for Youngjae and that is the reason why the kids never saw their daddy being mad or angry. Meanwhile Jaebeom, Jaebeom is like an urban mom who like to nag their child about everything (as what Youngjae describe him). The kids always asking for Youngjae’s help whenever Jaebeom started with the nag.

Jaebeom awake from his lovely memory then get up from his chair to get ready for the date.

This is for you my love, Jaebeom silently sigh.

Jinyoung just stare at the warm cup of tea that his mother had prepared for him.

“Jinyoung? Ready to share?”

“Urmmm, Eomma…. It was a silly things….”

“It’s nothing silly when you keep on thinking about it.”

“Okay, okay…. I.. I have a crush at someone when I was a teenager. He is my first love and the reason why I didn’t approach him is I thought that he is straight. So I just, you know, buried the feeling because it was so hard to fall for straight guy. One of the reason I never approach other people is because I don’t want to falling in love with a straight guy.” Jinyoung sigh.” I just found out that my old crush are not straight at all. He is gay. But now I don’t know whether my feeling is the real one or is it just the nostalgic part? Because I don’t want to hurt him.”

“Aww Jinyoung… Come here.”

Mrs. Park open her arms and let Jinyoung get into her arm. She keep cooing and stroking her son’s back.

“Well for me, if you don’t want to make the other guy hurt, I think you truly have feeling for him. The real one, not because of the memory or whatsoever things you thought. Because we as human being really don’t want to hurt the person we love or care.”

“Really?”

Jinyoung look at his mother with his watering eyes.

“Aww you cried… I never see you cried like this.. It’s been a while.”

“Eomma!!!!.”

“Sorry…Sorry… But yeah, if the guy is still single. Why don’t you try court him?”

“I don’t know. I mean, he already have kids… Urgh…. I don’t know.”

Mrs. Park keep still and silent for a while until Jinyoung look at her.

“Eomma? You okay?”

“Wait, Jinyoung can you tell me who is your crush is?”

“Hmmm, do I need to answer it now?”

“Well I do have someone in my mind but I don’t want to have a high hope about it.”

“Who?”

“I don’t know but I do remember someone like to draw his crushes face and throw the paper away, even when the art is suck but I do recognize the twin moles. But before I knew Jaebeom, I never had any clues who is your crush and after seeing how you conduct yourself around him my mind just click. No wonder when the first time they moved to the next door, I feel like Jaebeom look so familiar.”

“Eomma? You snoop around my things?”

“Yah! It’s not my fault when you never throws your paper inside the bin. I collect them and just curious. I don’t know you draw your crush with all those little heart. So does that mean your crush is no other than Lim Jaebeom?”

Jinyoung groan a little and look at his mother happy face and just nods.

“Yaaaaaaaaah. I am so excited, I always wanted someone like Jaebeom for my son but I don’t want to be that kind of mother who pushes his son around. Who would have thought that my son have a crush on my next door neighbour. It’s a fate! You know how we hated the old neighbour who reside before Jaebeom’s family? I thought that I will hate the new one too but nope, both of them are a great couple. They moved just after they get married and…Oh, now I realize what is your concern when you said you don’t want to hurt him.”

Jinyoung look away from his mother gaze, he don’t want his mother to be worried about his personal life.

“Nah eomma, just.. I am confuse.”

“Jinyoung… I don’t know how to sort your confusion but if you are afraid Jaebeom will not forget his love for his husband, he will never forget because what they have is something special. But it doesn’t mean that he can’t fall in love with you. You can try make him fall for you. If you want some help from your eomma or appa. Just let us know.”

“Eomma, it’s not that. I mean, I don’t know if I should approach him or not. He look just fine being by himself and his kids.”

“Jinyoung, you.. Well you just meet him now when it’s a year after Youngjae death but Jaebeom was so broken when he realize that his husband has cancer and might leave him and their kids. That time he come to us and ask us to be his emotional support because he can’t do it alone. It was the first time I saw Jaebeom crying. I mean now he look just fine but who knows what he feels. You can just be friend first?”

“I tried before but it’s never going to happen. I mean I want to be more than a friend.”

“If you mean what you said just be true to Jaebeom and we will see what happen.”

“But what if my confession make him hate me?”

“Jinyoung…. If that happen then try again to make him like you?”

Mrs. Park laugh when her son pout.

“Eomma, it’s not a laughing matter.”

“I know.. Now do you feel better after telling me?”

“Yes.”

“Okay, you can start asking for his date later when he come back.”

“What? You knew?”

“Duh, Jaebeom always told me about his day after Youngjae death. We are bestie you know.”

Mrs. Park then wink at her flabbergasted son and walk out from the room.

Jaebeom’s worker all gasp when they see their boss suit up and after a few teasing they finally leave their boss alone.

Jaebeom look at his watch and another 4 minutes the supposed date will be here. Jaebeom are really nervous. He can’t think other things to ease his nervousness so he just keep looking at the photo of the kids on his phone gallery.

Jaebeom chuckle every time he see the silly photo of his kids.

“You have a pretty smile.”

Jaebeom let out a small scream and look up and saw the person that Jackson set him up.

“Hmmm I would like to say your face is familiar but I can’t think a name at all. Sorry.”

“Ha ha ha, Jackson told me that. Well you might be familiar more to Jooheon. He is Jackson’s friend.”

“Yeah, I know him but you are not Jooheon. I know that guy he always come to my house.”

“Yeah, I am not. I am Jooheon’s friend. I once come to your son Youngjae’s first birthday. My name is Chae Hyungwon.”

“Hyungwon shi? Sorry I am with memorizing name. Nice to meet you. I am Jaebeom well you know that already. I don’t know why I introduce myself to you. Sorry. I am a little nervous.”

“Well it’s nice knowing that I make you nervous.”

Hyungwon smirk.

Jaebeom then laugh.

“Sorry, I.. Not like that, I mean this is my first time going out with another men so it’s make me nervous. Not you.”

“Aww, that too bad. Well I make you laugh. That is another point for me eh?”

“We will see bout that.”

“Okay, so do you want to follow me or ride with me?”

“I think I just follow you with my car. It’s easier like that.”

“Cool. But for a record you know that this date, my end resolution is to be in relationship with you? I am making this clear because I know we started being friend is what we should do but I have been waiting for this for so long.”

“Wait, I don’t understand.”

“Urmm, I… Actually we go to the same school but I am more like a shy kids and might have a feeling for you since that long?”

“What? Seriously?”

“Yeah… But not too much just a little.”

“What the… It’s weird… I mean not your feeling, your feeling are not weird but the circumstances is.”

“Well we can talk more in the restaurant?”

“Yeah.. Lead the way.”

Hyungwon just nods and went inside his car.

“You can do this!.”

Jaebeom said then went inside his own car and follow Hyungwon to the restaurant and as just Jaebeom suspected. They went to a high end restaurant a little bit far from their own town.

“This look fancy.”

Jaebeom said after the waiter seated them at the table.

“Really? I don’t know where to bring you and I ask Jackson where and he recommend me this place.”

“Ahh really? Sorry but this is Jackson’s taste and not mine.”

“Oh wait, we can change like now before we ordered.”

“Nah, it’s not like my taste but I don’t mind at all. The waiter already on her way here.”

Both of them ordered the food and now just waiting for the food to arrived.

“So, if this is not your taste. What is?”

Hyungwon ask after the waiter left their table.

“Well to be honest I love Korean food so any Korean restaurant is fine by me.”

“I see and wonder why Jackson didn’t tell me that.”

“Jackson is.. A little extra sometimes.”

“Yeah right, hmmm you really look beautiful.”

“Oh thanks, yours are not that bad too.”

“Really?”

“Yes, you know my husba… Opps sorry. I mean I rarely wear this kind of style because I am a layback kind of guy.”

Jaebeom nervously gulped down the water and smile at Hyungwon.

“You know what? You can actually talk about your late husband okay.”

“No way, Jackson going to be mad at me.”

“No, no. I insist. I don’t mind at all.”

“Is this like what usual people do? Talk about other person?”

“Nope, but seeing how nervous you are. I don’t mind talking about the things that will ease your nervous.”

“How considerate.”

“Falling for me yet?”

Hyungwon teased while wiggling his eyebrows.

“Nope.”

Jaebeom chuckles.

Both of them continue talking about each other’s life and after their foods arrived. They eat in silence. They end their date just after they eat dessert.

“So.. How do you feel about this date?”

Hyungwon nervously ask Jaebeom.

“Well I am surprise that I actually enjoy this. I don’t know why but in my mind this date will go like way worst than what happen.”

“I am glad to hear this. I hope we can have our second date?”

“Maybe.”

“Thank you.”

They bid each other goodbye and went back to their respective home.

Jaebeom come home with Jinyoung waiting on their gate that connects his house and the Park’s house.

“Hey… What are you doing here?”

“I just want to confirm something.”

“And what is it?”

“I am so sorry okay. But I hope that you will not be mad at me.”

After saying those confusing words Jinyoung grab Jaebeom and hug him.

Jaebeom who are confused as hell just stay still even when his heart thumps so loud.

Jinyoung just hug Jaebeom without any words and after a while, Jaebeom can’t feel his face because of the cold night air and just tap Jinyoung’s back.

“Sorry… I just I wanted to confirm something.”

“Confirm about what?”

“That I still love you.”

“Excuse me? What?”

“I love you.”

“Huh?”

“I love you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading my story! Hope you will enjoy this one.


	6. Chapter 6

“Don’t you joke around, I mean why you do this?”

“I am not joking! I meant everything I said.”

Jaebeom look at Jinyoung who are looking very desperate but then all of this really make Jaebeom head hurt.

“I am sorry, I will go in now.”

Jaebeom hesitant at first but then he turn toward his house. This is too much in just a day.

First, he have his first date ever and now his old crush are confessing to him. Jaebeom straightaway went to his room without even look at his kids room as he used to do whenever he come back. Jaebeom try to calm his heart. He don’t know why but his heartbeat keep rising and he felt a little bit warm.

Jaebeom take a deep breathe.

One

Two

Three 

Okay, now he is calm…..

Fuck who the heck that just confessed without saying anything?

Jaebeom shake his head and ready to change for the night.

Fuck.

Jinyoung thought after seeing Jaebeom flee toward his house. Jinyoung should have wait. Jaebeom doesn’t know that Jinyoung have feeling toward Jaebeom. Jaebeom might saw Jinyoung as someone stupid or creepy right now.

Ughhhh.

Jinyoung should not follow his stupid heart who suddenly wanted to let everything out because he is afraid that Jaebeom’s date might catch his attention. Jinyoung don’t want that to happen.

But now, now he wanted to just buried himself in a deep hole so that he can’t never resurfaced and meet with Jaebeom but at the same time his heart is beaten faster than ever when finally he can say how his real feelings toward Jaebeom.

Jinyoung took a deep breath.

He can face this, he is now an adult. Tomorrow he just need to let Jaebeom knows the truth.

THE NEXT DAY.

Jinyoung being awaken by a loud laughing from downstairs. He yawn and stretched.

Wait, it’s sound like Jaebeom’s kids. Jinyoung clumsily get down from his bed and after making sure he is decent enough he run downstairs.

He was then greeted by Jaebeom’s kids playing with his father.

“ Hi Jinyoung hyung!”

The eldest Youngjae greet him then the others just bows toward Jinyoung then ignore him all together to play with his father.

Jinyoung try to look around and there is no sight of Jaebeom.

“What are you looking for?”

Mrs. Park come while bringing 3 cup of juice.

“Nothing, why are the kids here?”

“Why hyung? You don’t like us being here?’ Youngjae ask after take a sip from the cute cup.

“No, not that. I am just curious. It’s school day right? Why are you here?”

Jinyoung said while helping Yugyeom with holding his cups that look like it’s going to slip of his hand.

“ Appa are still in bed even after Youngjae done getting ready to go to school. Appa didn’t even wake the babies to go to kindergarten. I don’t know why?”

Youngjae trying his best to explain what happen to Jinyoung and Jinyoung find it cute when Youngjae little face focusing on what word to say.

“Jaebeom is sick apparently, he call me asking if we can look after his kids for a while. The usual nanny are not free for today and Jaebeom missed the time to call the kindergarten to fetch the baby so here there are today.”

“I see, so do you need help looking after them?”

Mrs. Park gasp and looking at his son.

“What?”

“Are you serious? You never volunteer for helping me around here and now you just want to help me take care of another person kids?”

“I am just asking! Don’t need to be sarcastic about it.”

“Ha ha ha, sorry son. I was just shocked. Well I do need an extra hand especially to play with the kids. Poor your appa keep getting knocked by the kids.”

Jinyoung look at his father who is now on the floor being surrounded by three kids.

“I am fine though!” Mr Park

“Yeah, yeah just be careful with your back! You are not that young anymore.”

“Grandpa back hurt?” Bambam run toward Mrs. Park and sweetly ask her.

“Not now, but he will if he didn’t take a good care about his back.”

“No play with grandpa?” Bambam

“No, you can play with him just be careful okay?”

Bambam nods then look at Jinyoung.

“Hyung! Want to play?” Bambam look at Jinyoung with his puppy eye.

“Play what?”

“Don’t you know how to play?” Bambam scandalously loo at Jinyoung like he is from another planet.

“Of course I do! I really good at playing video games.”

“ Appa said video game is bad for us. We can’t play it why hyung can play?” Bambam

“ Because I am already a grown up. So I can play video game freely.’’

“ I want to be a grown up too!” Bambam excitedly hug Jinyoung’s leg.

“ Then you have to eat a lot of foods especially vegetables.”

“Really? If that, I don’t want to be grown up. I hate veggies especially brockaavi.” Bambam

“ Brockaavi? What is that?”

Bambam try to explain but he just making confused face. Then he ran toward Youngjae and whisper something.

“Broccoli. He mean broccoli, he hated it even when it’s so good.” Youngjae said after Bambam drag him towards Jinyoung.

Yugyeom followed after his hyung and Bambam.

“I eat broockli.” Yugyeom shyly said.

“Really? Wow you are so good, eating broccoli this young? Hyung don’t remember well but I do hate eating broccoli when I am your age but now.. Now I like to eat broccoli.” Jinyoung said while patting Yugyeom head.

“I am good too, I eat carrot and cucumber. Youngjae hyung don’t eat cucumber.” Bambam said and take Jinyoung hand to pat his head.

“Because I am allergic to eat. What do you know?” Youngjae blows raspberry at Bambam

“Okay enough, let’s talk about other things?” Jinyoung change the topic when he can sense that the kids will argue with each other.

“Hyung! Do you know that appa really really really like cats?” Yugyeom

“Yes I know, your appa used to give foods to the stray cats at school.”

“ Really? Wow. Appa wanted cat but daddy is allergic to cats so appa cannot have cat.” Yugyeom

“Really?”

“Yes hyung! Appa once pet a cat secretly but daddy still smell cat on appa that day and daddy keep sneezing and prohibit appa to stay near him. But the things is daddy the one who can’t stay away from appa.” Youngjae cheerfully said. “It’s sad that appa didn’t smile as big as when daddy is around.”

“Really? Well your appa still missing your dad so that is why he is still feeling a little bit sad but grandma told me that your appa said, you guys are one of the reason of his happiness.”

“ Really?” Youngjae beams.

Jinyoung beams.

“You listen that Bammie and Gyeom ah? Appa told grandma that you guys and me are appa happiness… Can you imagine it?” Youngjae said happily then jumps up and down.

Jinyoung just smile looking at the kids.

It’s weird, kids plus Jinyoung is not a combination that people will see but here he is playing with Jaebeom’s kids.

Well the three of them are so easy to pleased. Jinyoung just need to exaggerate any reaction and speak as loud as them then the kids were happy to see him acting or reading or playing with them.

It’s been a few hours after they eat lunch when there is the bell ringing and when he open it there stand Jaebeom with some patch on his forehead and looking so haggard.

“Hey are you okay?”

“I don’t know what the thing I ate yesterday but my stomach did not agree with it. I've been throwing up and also I keep going to the toilet.”

“That rough?”

“Yes, I need my kids now.”

“You didn’t look like you are okay…”

“I know, but I need to see them for a while then I will continue resting.”

“Do you want to go to see a doctor or some?”

“No need, I have the medicine for food poisoning.”

“Where did your date bring you to?”

“I don’t remember the name but it’s quite far. The restaurant is fancy, the food also good. I don’t know what happen..”

Jinyoung wanted to say more when he saw one car approaching Jaebeom’s house.

“You got a visitor.”

“Urghhh who is it?”

Jaebeom turn around to see the car park in front of Jinyoung’s house. Then Hyungwon get out and started walking toward them.

Hyungwon bows to Jinyoung and Jaebeom.

“Aaaah you are here, I wanted to give you some food poisoning medicine. The restaurant just call me saying that the clams they cook for us are bad and they didn’t realize it until one of the worker are sick so they just call me to ask if I am okay or not. Luckily I didn’t eat any clams but I remember that your aglio olio has some clams in it so I wondering if you are fine or not.” Hyungwon

“You can just call me?” Jaebeom lazily said.

“Well actually I wanted to see you. I mean I don’t know after last night you want to continue to the second date with me or not. You just give me that vibe that you might or might not be into me.” Hyungwon shyly scratches his head. “ Opps sorry,I forgot to introduce myself. I am Hyungwon.”

Hyungwon introduce himself then try to shake hand with Jinyoung. Jinyoung took his hand and suddenly both of them are in a some war because both of them keep gripping hard until one point Jinyoung wanted to scream but are save by the sound of Yugyeom shouting happily.

“Appa!!!!” Yugyeom

“My son! I missed you.”

Jaebeom kneel down so he can engulf his son with hug.

Jinyoung can see Hyungwon face changes when he see the kids and suddenly he feels triumph.

“Aaaaa, I always forgot that you still take care of the kids.” Hyungwon

“Of course they are my kids. Why did you mean by that?” Jaebeom feeling uncomfortable with Hyungwon's tone.

“Nah.. I don’t… I mean, I thought after your husband death. You will like give the kids away.” Hyungwon said nonchalantly.

Jinyoung can sense the emotion changes from Jaebeom’s face so Jinyoung ask Youngjae to take his brother inside.

“Excuse me? Jackson told you that I am a single father right?” Jaebeom

“I know and I am sorry to say that. I don’t know why I talk like that. I mean I know about it but I forget after yesterday date. You look like a normal single person.”

Jaebeom gasp.

“Hey, why are you saying that?” Jinyoung wanted to just kick or punch that jerk.

“You don’t think me as a normal person? Just because I had kids?” Jaebeom

“Not like that. I mean you are young and you have 3 kids. As a single parent too. I mean… that is not normal.” Hyungwon

“That because my husband is dead or else I wouldn’t have to be a single parent. Do you forget that I once married? Why are you saying things like this? Yesterday you didn’t even mention about this?”

“Because Jackson told me to avoid the topic.” Hyungwon

“Shoot, urghhh. Jackson should not say that. I mean you are so sweet saying I can talk about my husband but then you thought it’s weird for me raising my own sons?” Jaebeom

“ It is, in my point of view though.” Hyungwon

“Oh words, I am so sorry Hyungwon shi but if you think that I give a 50/50 vibe from last night. I just want to make it clear. I don’t want the 2nd date or the 3rd or even staying friend with someone who opinion about me being a single parent is not normal. Sorry again but yeah I really don’t want to mingle with someone that think raising my child is something not normal.” Jaebeom

“I didn’t mean it like that, they are not even your real kid.” Hyungwon

“Can you please just go. I am still sick and I don’t have the energy to discuss this with you right now.” Jaebeom

“I am sorry.” Hyungwon

Hyungwon go away without any other words.

Jinyoung just look at Jaebeom who are now just closing his eyes pinching his nose bridge and without any words Jinyoung hug Jaebeom.

“I know this might sound weird or not in a good timing but I never thought about you being a single parent or young parent as weird. It’s your choice and you did a great job being the brats parent.”

“Why did you call my kid brat?” Jaebeom look up at Jinyoung and he didn’t mind the hug at all.

“Well one of them keep saying how am I a grown adult should not pay video games and the other keep glaring at me because I don’t know how to read like you.”

“Thank you.” Jaebeom close his eyes and tighten his hug.

Jinyoung just keep quit and pat Jaebeom’s back. Even when Jaebeom's hug give him chills.

“By the way, did you mean everything you said to me yesterday?” Jaebeom who are now look straight at Jinyoung's face.

“Every word.” Jinyoung

“Cool then.” Jaebeom.


	7. Chapter 7

Jaebeom still feeling under the weather even when he already eats the medicine and add with the anger from what Hyungwon’s words. Jaebeom never thought the person he meet last night is so open about his hatred toward Jaebeom being a single parent.

Jaebeom know not all person will see him being a young parents and now a single parent raising 3 kids something appropriate but this is the first time he heard someone literally call him as abnormal. Why is it not normal to raise a bunch of sweetheart?

Youngjae is the one who always told him to be more patience and just ignore the words but now when he is not around, Jaebeom is over thinking.

Thanks for Jinyoung who cool him down by hugging him and make Jaebeom feel the warmth.

But now Jaebeom kind of missed the warmth feeling of being cuddled. Jaebeom used to have his husband cuddled him overnight while whispering words of love.

Jaebeom always misses his husband but for some reason he keep reminding about how warmth Jinyoung hug and how Jinyoung keep reassuring Jaebeom that Hyungwon is the jerk one and Jaebeom should not take his word seriously.

Jaebeom fall asleep with Jinyoung’s words keep lingering in his mind.

Jinyoung still don’t know what is the meaning of Jaebeom’s words yesterday.

After what had happen with Hyungwon, Jaebeom took the kids and after saying goodbye they did not speak a words at all.

Well one because Jinyoung still don’t have Jaebeom’s phone number and second it’s only 6 am in the morning but Jinyoung still can feel the warmth from Jaebeom’s body and the smell of him. Jinyoung can’t sleep well because he keep imagining some other things whenever his eyes close.

Jinyoung shake his head.

Today he will talk to Jaebeom about his feelings. He will let out about everything and hope for the best which is Jaebeom will accept his love or else, Jinyoung might run away and never come back here again.

Jinyoung thinks again about his feelings. Jinyoung wanted to be sure about his own feeling because he don’t want to be the jerk who just reminisce about the old time. But after seeing how he wanted to punch Hyungwon even when the guy is so much larger than him. Jinyoung are now sure that he is indeed in love with his first crush.

Seeing Jaebeom face yesterday on how he was so shocked and sad, Jinyoung wanted to do more than just a hug. He wanted to keep Jaebeom away from all the sadness. But first he need to be a man that worth Jaebeom’s love.

Jinyoung need to prove to Jaebeom how serious he is about his love toward him. Jinyoung is determine to be a worthy guy for Jaebeom’s love.

Jinyoung already waiting outside of Jaebeom’s house when he saw Bambam and Yugyeom walking out from the house while Youngjae shout at the back asking his little brother to wait for him.

Bambam and Yugyeom squeal when they saw Jinyoung and run towards him.

“Hyung!! What are you doing here?” Yugyeom

“I just missing you guys and your appa too.” Jinyoung

“Huh? We just meet yesterday? Why you miss us?” Bambam

“Just because…” Jinyoung wanted to explain more but then he heard Jaebeom’s voice asking if everyone is ready.

“Hi.” Jinyoung says when both of their eyes meets.

“Hi.” Jaebeom said then smile. “What are you doing early in this morning?”

“Well I want to show how I mean every words that I say. So starting today I will be helping you with your kids because I don’t just want their appa love but the brats too.” Jinyoung sheepishly said.

Jinyoung can see the shocked expression from Jaebeom and glad when Jaebeom just shake his head.

“Well how are you so confident about me saying okay with whatever shenanigan that you will do?” Jaebeom raise his eyebrows.

“First, I am not confident but I wanted to show you that I am serious. Second your hug give me some sort of assurance and you hug me tight.” Jinyoung smirk.

Jaebeom jaws open a little and Jinyoung can see the blushes creeping out from his cheeks.

“ Urmm what are you saying hyung?” Youngjae

Jaebeom then bow down until he is in the same eye level with Youngjae.

“Hyung actually in love with your appa way long before and now he is trying to make your appa fall for hyung. I don’t know if you understand me but what I am trying to say is, I wanted to make your appa happy again. Can I?”

“Woah! You wanted to make my appa happy? Of course you can! I will be so happy if I can see appa happy again. Even Yugyeom and Bambam will love it. Right guys?” Youngjae then ask his brother and both Yugyeom and Bambam just nods their face while smiling.

“Yah stop being nonsense, kids get inside the car now. We are late!.” Jaebeom ushered his kids inside the car and then he look at Jinyoung.

“I will hear your explanation later. Now go away.”

Jaebeom said then walk inside his car and drive away.

Jinyoung just watch how Jaebeom try to suppress his smile. This is a good sign.

“Appa, appa. Is it true that Jinyoung hyung will make you happy again?” Youngjae

“What? Don’t listen to what that hyung said okay?” Jaebeom

“But you look so happy appa! Even your face is red now! Why? Are you cold?” Youngjae.

“Nothing honey, nothing at all.”

Jaebeom said then checks his expression at rear view mirror and saw how his cheeks is red and the giddy smile.

Jaebeom clear his throats. Then calmly drive his car.

Jaebeom open his office room and there is a lot of bouquet and in the middle of the room is Jackson kneeling with a hand banner saying SORRY.

“What are you doing inside my office?”

“I am so freaking sorry. I never thought Hyungwon is like that! I should have known when he always change the topic when I talk about my babies.”

“You don’t have kids.”

“What now? Are you so mad that you will not make me as the godparent now? Please Jaebeom I am so sorry! I will now stop looking for your future lover! You can do anything and I will not mendling at all! Well maybe with your neighbour hot son but then it’s off!.”

“Yah, you just said you will not meddle with my love life but then what now?”

“Well, maybe because I saw how that hot guy stare at you? Or maybe urmm I just remember something from the past?’

“What things?”

“Well, you remember how much I beg you to just confessed your love to the Park kid? Urmm it’s because I accidentally heard him saying he love you?”

“Wait! What? When?”

“I don’t remember the exact date but it’s time for us to go back home and I left something at the library. So when I retrieve my things I somewhat listen to Jinyoung confessing? I mean he was writing out loud.”

“Urgh why you didn’t tell me back then?”

“I was like asking you to just confessed but then I forgot about that. Well I am just an active teenager back then! Why? Are you mad at me? I so sorry.”

“No I am not, I mean maybe? But then if I confessed and Jinyoung say yes. I might not have my kids now? And also Youngjae will not be my husband too. I love my life. I don’t regret anything.”

“I know and I can see that! You live your life just what you want. I am proud of you.”

“Thanks Jacks. I am not mad at you, you know I can’t live without you right.”

Jackson then get up and hug Jaebeom.

“I am so sorry, well Hyungwon sorry too. He told me he don’t know why he said that to you but he said he was feeling insecure or jealous even when he saw you and Jinyoung talking happily.”

Jackson released Jaebeom from his hug.

“What? I was sick?”

“But he told me you look happy even when you are sick. You know what that mean right? Maybe I just say okay? Maybe your old feeling about Jinyoung are back?”

“I… I… I am.”

“Wait, what?!!!”

“I urmm how should I say this? Urm, my heart kind of tingly when I saw Jinyoung try to talk with my kids even when he look so awkward with them. I feel something and the night of my date with Hyungwon. Jinyoung confessed to me. Even when I was so confused at first but then I feel something that I never felt before.”

“What?”

“The sound of my heartbeat…. It sound like when I am in love.”

“OH MY GOD!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH GOD!! MY PRAYER HAVE BEEN ANSWERED!”

Jackson shout excitedly then he hug Jaebeom again.

“But don’t you think it was weird? I mean my husband just died a year ago then my heart suddenly thumping out loud for the long lost crush. I feel like I am cheating on Youngjae.”

“Jaebeom… No, no , no. Urgh is this your real feeling? Don’t even think about you cheating on Youngjae. Youngjae ask you specifically to find your new happiness when he died. He even ask me and Mark to help you find your new love. Because he know that you are a person with a big heart, Youngjae knows you will always love him after he died and he also knows that you will be alone after even when you will not admit it. It’s been a year. Some people might say it’s only a year but some people say one year is a long time. Who fucking care about their opinion? You just need to think about your own feelings.”

“But, I am afraid to take the next step. What if when I do take the next step, I realize that I don’t want to be with him? I will break his heart. I don’t want that.”

“Jaebeom, I've seen you having a crush for him for long ass time. I am pretty sure you will never break his heart and even if you do, I am pretty sure Jinyoung can handle it. That man have been in love for you since long ass time too.”

“You think so?”

“Pretty sure.”

“What about the kids? I don’t want them to thinks that I will replace their daddy.”

“Jaebeom your kids are still young but they are smart. Even now that they know you terribly missing Youngjae, they make sure to make you happy. I know they will love Jinyoung and also will never forget their daddy too. I know you can handle this issues so well.”

Jackson said then cup Jaebeom face.

“I don’t know why I have this conversation in my office when I should work!.”

“Well, it started when you throw the bomb about the hot guy confessed to you.”

“Can you please stop calling Jinyoung the hot guy, he has name and you know his name too.”

“Oh, possessive now?”

“Stop it.”

“ You know I will be happy if you are happy.”

“I know.”

“Be happy.”

“Okay.”

Jinyoung are just chilling while waiting for Jaebeom to come back home when his father ask him.

“So when will you go back to the city? It’s been a while you are here right?”

Fucking shits. Jinyoung forget. Jinyoung too out his phone and he has only 3 days more until his leave will end.

Fuck.

“Ahhh, I have 3 more days. I always forget about days whenever I am free of work.”

“You work hard, you look so tired when you come here last week. Now you look so much younger. Cheerful even.”

“Well mom keep feeding me home made food and yes without works I feel free er.”

“Glad you feel like that. You know your mom and me always hope that you will stay here for good right?”

“I know but not now I think. I mean… I love my job and everything at Seoul.”

“You know that Jaebeom never follow you back to the Seoul right?”

“Wait, appa. What do you mean.”

“I have eyes and ears, well your eomma is not a great secret keeper. She excitedly told me about your what is her word again? Hrmmm ah yes, crush. You have a big fat crush toward Jaebeom right?”

Jinyoung just cover his face.

“I know it’s not my right to say things but I already think of Jaebeom and Youngjae as my own family. I don’t want you to give fluttering feelings toward Jaebeom then crush it when something didn’t go with your way.”

“Appa, I didn’t even confessed to him. Yet.”

“I know, I just want you to think more before you confessed. Jaebeom will never leave here. His husband buried here. He has his own work and farm here. I just want to make it clear okay?.”

Jinyoung sigh then nods.

He is fucked.


	8. Chapter 8

Jaebeom feeling giddy and somewhat nervous when he saw Jinyoung standing at Jaebeom’s porch. Jackson had taking the kids to sleep over at his house for their weekly off with the godparent.

“Hey where is the brats?”

“That the first thing you ask me?”

“What? The brats is like my happy pills now.”

“Yeah right, your mom keep saying how you keep whining after the kids are back home. How tired you are and how my kids are so bratty.”

“Well I am just a human.”

There a little silent between them when both of them don’t know what to say.

“Would you like to come in?” Jaebeom

“Thought you will never ask me.” Jinyoung smile.

Jinyoung then follow Jaebeom.

It’s the second time Jinyoung come inside Jaebeom’s house but he is always in awe how the decoration of the house feel so warm and at the same time feel familiar. Jinyoung then conclude that Jaebeom might have the same taste as him.

“Would you like something to drink? Coffee? Tea? Water?” Jaebeom politely ask.

“No, thank you. I would like us to start the talk. If you may?”

“Of course.” Jaebeom said then sit at the opposite chair so now there were like face to face with each other.

“Okay, I think I should clarify about my sudden confession.”

“I hope so, because it’s kind of out of blue for me.”

“But it’s not for me. I mean, I actually have this desire no, feelings. Yes, feelings. I have feelings for you since we were at the high school. I always admire you and in love with you but at that time I have this low self esteem? And I might think that you are straight so yeah, with that assumption. I buried my feeling and fly away from here so that I can forget you. But who am I kidding. Even when I am in a relationship. I always thought of you. Not 24/7 but when the weather is bad, I always wonder if you bring the umbrella or when I buy foods especially a new creation, I would think if you will like this new taste. Just like that. The actual reason I come back is because my heart is broken when my last boyfriend giving up on me but that is another story. So when I first saw you at your fruit shop, I thought okay maybe this is my time to do something about my huge crush on you? But mind you at this time I still think you are straight.”

Jaebeom chuckle and he gesture Jinyoung to continue his story.

“So can you imagine on how shocked I am when you tell me you have kids with your husband? I was like super shocked and kind of angry with young me because I never brave enough to just confess to you! And I am kind of jealous at your husband but this is before I knew he was dead. I am so sorry to hear that and the next dilemma I had is whether I am still in love with you or this is just a nostalgic feeling but no worries I already know about the answer because I confessed to you. I am 100% sure that I am in love with you. So you don’t worry about that part.”

“You love me?”

“Yes.”

“Me?”

“Yup.”

“Since high school?”

“Yes but at that time I am just a coward and I am not as bold as I am today.”

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Okay.”

“That’s it?”

“What would you want me to say?”

“I don’t know, like reject me, I mean don’t reject me but something.”

“Okay now listen to me.”

Jinyoung nods.

“I lost my husband, my dear husband. A year ago. The person who has been my pillar. The one who always be there for me whenever I need someone. I lost him because of cancer. And I am still grieving for him. You know that my husband is the only guy who confessed to me and be my everything except for my first love.”

Jinyoung heart then shaken a little, he don’t know why but he really can’t win if Jaebeom first love come here and take Jaebeom away from him.

“Hey, are you okay? You look pale…”

“No, no.. I am fine, you can continue.”

“You want to know how I fall for my husband?”

“Enlighten me.”

“Well we are neighbour at the same building. He was living with his uncle and I am with my father but my father are not himself after mom’s death. So one day he really beat me up so bad that I keep asking for help, screaming actually. But no one came until at one moment when I thought I am gonna die, my front door then flew open. I cant see who is it because my badly bruised eye but I can hear the guy screaming and pull my father away from me and there a few cops too. What I can’t forget is the guy voice, he keep calling me and when I open my eye, he look like an angel. I always think of him as my savior but the next years he suddenly told me he have feelings for me and well at that time my first love already leave to further his study and I was like why not. I am not totally I love with my husband but he make me fall for him and the rest is history.”

“So what happen with your first love?”

“Well he is back and he confessed to me.”

“What? When does he do that? I mean before my confession or after my confession.”

Jaebeom was trying not to laugh seeing Jinyoung’s frantic expression.

“At the same night you confessed.”

“What the hell? Who is he? That jerk you went to date with?”

“Nope.”

“What? So you tell me that at the same night you went out on a date with another guy, get confessed by me and another guy?”

“No, only one guy.”

“Wait, wait, wait. This does not make sense unless… Unless…”

Jaebeom can see Jinyoung expression change, his eyes become wider when he realize something.

“Am I your first love?”

Jaebeom just nods.

“No fucking way, are you serious?” Jinyoung jump from his seat and was back and front before he stop and walk toward Jaebeom. “ You are not kidding right?”

“Nope. I fall for this one guy who are a bit emo kid back then but he keep helping me around and I don’t know why but he make my heart thumps everytime we are together.”

Jinyoung groans for a while before he look at Jaebeom.

“I actually wanted to kiss you right now.”

“Then do it.”

Jaebeom don’t know how many second Jinyoung’s lips are on his but he just let Jinyoung monopolize him. He used to imagine Jinyoung’s lips on his when they were alone cleaning up something in a small classroom. He always wanted to touch Jinyoung’s face at the time.

Jaebeom then cup Jinyoung’s face to make him stop.

“I don’t think I can continue talking if you keep kissing me like this.” Jaebeom then smile and give a chaste kiss on Jinyoung’s cheeks.

“Gosh, you are right. I don’t want to suddenly attack you.” Jinyoung bite his lower lips and wondering when he can kiss Jaebeom again.

“So anything else?” Jaebeom

“ I have this one concern, I mean my appa does.” Jinyoung took Jaebeom and make him sit next to him.

“Mr. Park? About what?”

Jinyoung intertwined his finger with Jaebeom and lightly stroke Jaebeom’s cute fingers.

“You know I am here for only 2 weeks then I need to come back to Seoul?.”

“Oh.”

“Yes.”

And this point Jaebeom take his fingers and sit a few inches away from Jinyoung.

“I see, I mean… I totally forgot that you are here for just a while and if you ask me to come stay with you. I will reject you. You know that right?”

Jinyoung look at his lovers face well Jaebeom is his right?

“I know, my appa also told the same things.”

“So what now? Are you going to say that you don’t think this going to work? But why you kiss me then?”

“Woah! Slow down, I didn’t say that. No, I didn’t think this relationship will not work. It just my father words make me think hard. I love my jobs there and I know you love your jobs here. Even your late husband are here. I will never ask you to come with me and I also don’t want to quit my job and leave everything for you. I need to go back next 2 days or…”

“You can just go now, what making you stay?”

Jinyoung can see the differences between Jaebeom’s tone and face now than earlier. Now he look so cold and there no affection in his face.

“Jaebeom?”

“I would like you to go now.”

“But, I didn’t finished my words.. I have some…”

“Can you just go, I should know better than to chase what I know that will never come true.”

“Wait, Jaebeom what are you talking about?”

“I am sorry Jinyoung, I love you and I know you love me too but I know you will initiate long distance relationship but I don’t think I can do that. I want someone who can stay by my side like my husband. Be there when I need someone. I don’t want to be the reason you left your job, the dreams job that you love. I know you can come back and visit but until when. I don’t think my heart can take it when some day you realize I am just not worth it. Your time, your energy because long distance relationship needs a lot of mental and physical support. I can do this physically but mentally I don’t. And I don’t want to make my kids confused. I need someone not just for me but my kids too. What if they too attached for you but then you want to leave me? I don’t mind but I don’t want the kids to suffer the second time. They already have a hard time when Youngjae died.”

“Jaebeom, I think you misunderstand things.”

“I am so sorry Jinyoung but can you leave?”

“This is what you want huh?” Jinyoung sigh “ I know you just making this bunch of reason but the real things is you can’t stop loving your dead husband!”

Jinyoung knows his words going to hurt Jaebeom even when he don’t want to hurt him at all and Jinyoung is right, Jaebeom’s face shows everything and he don’t know what to do to take back his word.

“Jaebeom, I am sorry…”

“No..Nope. Maybe you are right, I can’t never stop loving my husband because he is the best things that happen to me! Now I ask you nicely, please just go.”

Jaebeom then turn his body away from Jinyoung because he don’t want Jinyoung to see him crying.

Jinyoung look at Jaebeom’s back and suddenly he feels numbs.

What have he done? He hurt the only person that occupy his heart for all these time.

“I am sorry.”

Jinyoung said then leave.

Jaebeom took a deep breathe.

He have had enough.

“Jinyoung?” Mrs. Park are surprise when she heard the door bang loudly from his son room.

She open the door and his son was packing his things.

“Where are you going?” Mrs. Park, “ Son.”

“I am sorry eomma, there is this emergency work that I need to go and settle.”

“Really? But it’s already late?” Mrs. Park

“Yup, I know but then it’s emergency so I need to be there early morning tomorrow. So I just need to go now.”

“Okay.” Mrs. Park didn’t say anything but she knows that his son leaving might be because of Jaebeom. Jinyoung are so giddy and excited for the whole day and Mrs Park pretty sure that Jinyoung went to see Jaebeom just now.”

“Appa already asleep right? Let him be, I will call him tomorrow or when I free.”

Jinyoung said then kiss his mom and leave the house.

Jaebeom can hear the car roaring and he pretty sure that is Jinyoung. Well this is fine, he can’t bear to be with Jinyoung and received all the love but in the end lose Jinyoung all the way. Let him hurt for now so he can forget Jinyoung all over again.

That night Jaebeom cry himself to sleep at the empty living room wishing that he never hope for Jinyoung’s love.

Jinyoung driving calmly despite how his real feels is. He never knows that today is the last time he will meet Jaebeom. Jinyoung already plan for tomorrow picnic with the brats but it’s look like that their appa really don’t want to be with Jinyoung.

This is the last time he wishes to be with Jaebeom. Jinyoung should realize sooner that he will never win when Jaebeom already had husband. Even when the said husband is already died.

He come back to his own house.

Home at last, Jinyoung thinks.

He look around at his living room but he feels nothing.

Whatever, Jinyoung went straight to his bedroom and flop into the soft mattress.

“This is the feelings…”

Jinyoung then replay all the things that happen with Jaebeom. He thought he already bare everything to Jaebeom but seems like Jaebeom don’t think long distance relationship will work.

Jinyoung then sigh.

He close his eyes and his mind betrayed him when the memory of Jaebeom’s lip on his lips surface. That is the only thing Jinyoung want for all his teenager time. To be kissed by Jaebeom and it was better that his own imagination.

But why did Jaebeom said all those word?

Jinyoung thinks when his anger and sadness calm down.

Does Jinyoung look like he just kidding with his confession? What is the reason that make Jaebeom suddenly feels that the relationship will never work?


	9. Chapter 9

Jackson come back with Jaebeom sleeping in the sofa with swollen eyes. He ask Mark to bring the kids to their room and wakes Jaebeom up.

“Hey… Something happen?” Jackson ask when Jaebeom slowly losing his sleepiness.

Jaebeom were quiet for a while then Jackson can see the panic stricken on his face.

“I’ve done it again, I’ve push him over just because I am scared. I am so scared Jackson ah.”

“Hey, hey, hey. What happen? What are you scared of?”

“ Jinyoung talk about how he will go back to his life in Seoul and suddenly my mind are supplying this situation when I was to attached for him and he left me just because I will not follow him back to Seoul. I mean my late husband buried here and the kids love living here with their friends and all.”

“Okay so what did you do?”

“I ask him to leave without hearing his explanation. I don’t know but I don’t think my heart can take it if he do leave me after I give him my heart.”

“Ahhh Jaebeom, let me hug you.”

Jackson hug Jaebeom and just pat his back.

“Your insecurity never change right? You have the same problem with Youngjae too, remember how you ask Youngjae to cancel the wedding just because you are afraid he leave you alone right? Jaebeom…. I know your mom sudden death scarred you and your father has change for the worst but you look how Youngjae never leave you before his death. You don’t need to be so insecure, I mean it is valid but don’t you think it’s unfair to Jinyoung who confessed to you because he love you?”

Jackson then look at Jaebeom. His friend look so pitiful, the red puffy eye and his lips also look swollen. Jaebeom might bite the bottom lips when he try not to cry out loud.

“But… He already left, I hear his car leaving at the middle of the night. He is gone.” Jaebeom sniffles.

“Well I am too if I was in his shoes. The guy who you just confessed ask me to leave him alone and I think you throws lots of words that make him hurt?”

“Maybe, I don’t remember.”

“Jaebeom… Tell me the truth, what do you feel about Jinyoung.”

“I love him.”

“There you answer it so smoothly, why are you still afraid?”

“I don’t know man, I mean.. I am now have my kids not only me. I don’t want them to be too attached and in the end going through the sadness when Jinyoung leave.”

“Do you realize something?”

“What?”

“You keep saying if Jinyoung leave, what happen he doesn’t leave? Why are you so sure he will leave you?”

“He said he will never move here just for my sake and when I heard that I was like he is right. I don’t want to be the reason he lost his work or anything that he love in his life. I don’t want to be blame as the one who make him change.”

“But I think you guys can handle it even if it’s long distance.”

“Jackson, I don’t know.”

“Jaebeom, just try. I know you are scared and all those insecurities inside your cute little mind but I saw how happy you are when you told me about Jinyoung’s confession. You love this guy way longer than you think. I am pretty sure than Jinyoung will do anything he can to make sure the relationship between you guys will work.”

Jaebeom keep thinking how he actually feels like Jinyoung knows what to do but his own insecurity make him hurt Jinyoung.

“I don’t need to think about this anymore. I will just need to keep up my life with my kid. Jinyoung already left and I know it’s my fault but maybe this is our destiny. Me and him are not destine to be together in this life. I am fine, I promise I will never cry because of my fool action anymore.”

“Jaebeom….”

“No Jackson, it’s fine. Please don’t say anything to Jinyoung or his parents okay? Please? For me?”

“Fine but if I saw you cry again, I will drag you to meet Jinyoung and settle down both of your feelings.”

“Okay.”

Jinyoung can’t sleep, it’s been a week since he come to Seoul and he started working a few days ago. He try to maintain his own feelings so it’s never disturb his work productivity but it seem like it’s not working, his colleagues keep asking him what is wrong because he is not like the Park Jinyoung before the vacation happen.

Jinyoung just shrug them off with a joke but he knows really well what is the reason of his downfall mood.

Lim Jaebeom.

Jinyoung keep pondering whether he could ask Jaebeom’s number from his mother but then he don’t want to be the one who disturb Jaebeom. Jinyoung missed Jaebeom. It’s funny he had live his life before Jaebeom but now it’s a short time only not even a month with Jaebeom make him miss the other guy so much.

Jinyoung missed the brats too. He now unconsciously watching the brats favourite cartoon. He remember it well when the kids watch them at his house one time when they just hanging out. Jinyoung wanted to speak with the kids so much. He love listening and watching Youngjae explain almost everything toward his brother whenever Yugyeom and Bambam look lost and asking Youngjae to explain with those puppy eyes.

One day he actually call his mother out of blue just so he can maybe hear the kids voices but nope. His mother was out of town that day and wondering why Jinyoung call her.

Jinyoung then looking at his watch and was shocked when it’s time for him to go back home. Time also changes after he went back to Seoul. Some day he feel like the time come so slowly and sometime the time went as fast like today. He was so focused on his work that he realize he just missed lunch.

No wonder his colleague can sense something wrong because Park Jinyoung never missed lunch before.

Whatever, he can just grab something on his way back home.

Jinyoung then tiredly walk toward his car at the almost empty parking lots and were surprise seeing someone standing near his car.

“Park Jinyoung?” The stranger ask when Jinyoung arrive.

“Urmm who asking?” Jinyoung who are now half tired and half scared, tried to think what he can do if the stranger is a bad guy or a thieve.

“I am sorry this might scared you but don’t worry I am not a bad guy.”

“I heard that a lot in the movie but at the end whoever said that is a bad guy.”

“Sorry, well my name is Mark Tuan. I don’t think you recognize me.”

“Jaebeom’s friend right? Why are you here? Something happen to Jaebeom?”

“No, no, no he is just fine. Well like nothing happen.”

Jinyoung heart break a little when Mark said that, now he is sure that Jaebeom really don’t care about him.

“I mean not like normal Lim Jaebeom that I used to know but he living. Wondering why you ask about his well being the first things after I introduce myself.”

“Just because you are his friend what other things you will talk to me if it’s not about Jaebeom.”

“You are right and on that note can we talk?”

“Now?”

“If you don’t mind or you can just tell me when and I hope that time I am free from my husband and my bestfriend just like today.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well to be clear my husband have told me numerous time to never talk to you because Jaebeom ask him not to do so but then my husband is what is the word? Worry? Yes he is worried about Jaebeom that he keep asking me what should he do and it’s actually annoying because he keep asking me everyday before we sleep. And it’s make our sexy time become less and less.”

“I don’t think I need that information.”

Mark clears his throat when he realize what he just said to Jinyoung.

“Sorry but can we talk?”

Jinyoung look at his watch and thinking if this will tire him tomorrow but the idea of talking about Jaebeom make his tired self become more living?

“Okay, but I need to eat, care to join me?”

Mark just nods.

They arrived at Jinyoung’s favourite food stalls after 20 minutes of car ride.

After ordering the drinks and foods they just keep being silent.

“We can talk after you eat.” Mark said after the foods arrived.

Jinyoung just nods because right now he is starving.

“Okay what do you want to talk about?” Jinyoung said after wiping his mouth with the wet tissues.

Mark who looks up from his phone then look at Jinyoung’s plate just nods.

“ First thing first, I know that you might fall for Jaebeom because of his personality at school right? The cheerful vice president of the student council , the guy who looks approachable and everything. Right?”

Jinyoung didn’t say anything.

“Well inside he is not like that at all. You might not know this, even Jackson his best friend didn’t notice this before but Jaebeom have this huge insecurities. He is afraid of people leaving him. That is why he keep being the nice guy so people will like him and at that time we all thought he was just being friendly. Because he is actually a reserved kind of guy when we are in the middle school. He never had any friend except for me and Jackson. Jackson was so happy with the changes. Both of us didn’t realize the changes happen after the death of his mother.”

Mark then take a sip out of his water and continue.

“Jaebeom is very close to his parents, he is an only child. Unfortunately his mother died in an accident and leave Jaebeom alone with his father. But Mr Lim can’t accept his wife passing so he turn to drinking to forget about his grieving. Jaebeom try hard to make Mr Lim stop drinking but it’s make Jaebeom the victim of his father beating. We don’t know about this until we finished high school and the day Youngjae save Jaebeom.”

Jinyoung feelings keep changing from pity, anger and sadness when he heard about Jaebeom.

“After that, Jaebeom changes again. He become his old reserved self but worsen. He didn’t talk much even when Jackson’s in the same room. He only speak to Youngjae for some reason and that time Jackson are so jealous but then both of us see how Youngjae actually care for Jaebeom. He took care of him before they dating until they get married. We are so happy because Jaebeom become more open and happy. Then the adoption begin. Jaebeom become the happiest person when he knows his adoption form are being accepted. Everything was just great. Jackson and I was so thankful for Youngjae and the kids because now we have the cheerful Jaebeom again.”

Mark then stop talking and look at his phone. He is smiling.

“Sorry, Jackson are having sleepover at Jaebeom’s house and he just sent me the cute photo of the kids.”

“Can I see it?” Jinyoung blurt out.

“Okay.”

Mark give his phone to Jinyoung and Jinyoung finally can see his brats looking so cute wearing a headband and looking so cozy.

“You missed them huh?”

“Of course. I’ve just meet them for a few days but these three kids already hold my heart.”

“Yes, they are the reason Jaebeom didn’t fall back being the old him. I can see how devastated Jaebeom is after Youngjae’s death but the kids are his backbone. They ground Jaebeom so he never seclude everything like before. I am so relieved. So after a few months Jackson has the idea to find Jaebeom a new lover to help him managed the kids but Jaebeom always reject the offer. We knows it’s only a while after Youngjae’s death but Youngjae the one who ask us to make sure Jaebeom found someone to take care of him. They both love each other so much. But even back then, Jaebeom have this huge insecurity that even on his wedding day he wanted to quit it. Luckily Youngjae is the one who know him best and after a talk with Jaebeom they continue the occasion.”

“That is actually one of my concern before I confessed to him. How Jaebeom love his husband so much. I can’t win with his dead husband. But I also have this huge feeling that I want to be by his side. I don’t know Mark. Maybe I already turn blind with my love that I don’t see why Jaebeom is upset. I didn’t even say anything at all.”

“ I understand your side but just to be clear Jaebeom never had any relationship before Youngjae so he sometime doesn’t know or oblivious about certain things. With Jaebeom you need to be frank. Tell him the truth even if it hurt him. I don’t know what did you say to him but Jackson said your word make Jaebeom think hard about if he want to continue or not with the relationship.” Mark clears his throat. “ I may not be the one Jaebeom share his story with but I am the one who understand him the most in my opinion. So maybe you said words that make Jaebeom act like that?”

Jinyoung thinks for a while.

“I just said that I will never changes my lifestyle even for him but I never meant like that. I don’t know… I mean my father just make me realize that I should think a lot about if I want to continue this relationship I need to work hard. Maybe Jaebeom misunderstood?”

“He sure are, I mean he doesn’t want to be the reason you need to change what you already have here.”

“But when I am here, my mind always with him. I don’t think I can continue living like this.”

“Jinyoung, you are a smart boy based on what Jaebeom always tell us. You can figure this out. It’s late, I need to go back to the hotel before my colleague think I bail him before our important meeting tomorrow. Thank you for talking with me and good luck.” Mark bow and leave Jinyoung.

Another day have passed and Jaebeom try to live like his old life before someone name Park Jinyoung arrived and somehow make Jaebeom life a little more colourful? Nope not colourful but Jinyoung make his life happier for a reason. The reason is Jinyoung make his heart thumps faster before he even confessed to Jaebeom.

His crush on Jinyoung never fade.

It’s all covered by Youngjae’s love for him that he forgot how Park Jinyoung always have affected his life before.

Jaebeom sigh.

He wanted to apologize because his own insecurities. He realize now that Jinyoung is the one he wanted to be with. His kids also ask about their Jinyoung hyung.

Mr and Mrs. Park just told them how their son has this emergency work that he need to settle so he went back to Seoul without even given a proper goodbye.

Jaebeom shake his head and ready to get back home.

The kids are extra whining this week so their uncle volunteer to bring them to their house so they will go to the city to play in the weekend.

Jaebeom kind of relieved to be alone but at the same time he already missed his brats.

Jaebeom park his car and were taking out his take out foods from the back of the car and were surprises seeing a figure in front of his front door.

“Shit, you scared me.”

“Sorry, doesn’t mean too.” Jinyoung sheepishly said then walk toward Jaebeom

Wait, what?

“Jinyoung? Why are you here?”

“To do this.”

Jinyoung said then took Jaebeom face and give him a deep kiss.

Jaebeom were surprise at first but then he just give in.

“I really wanted to do that since the last time we kissed.” Jinyoung then rest his forehead on Jaebeom’s.

“What does this mean?”

“I mean it everything I said, I love you. I am sorry if my words make you feel so insecure or you might misunderstand things but please believe me I love you.”

Jaebeom does not think much than to grab Jinyoung’s neck and kiss the guy who he have been pining for all his high school year.

“I love you too” Jaebeom breathlessly said and laugh watching Jinyoung’s expression.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is basically the end of the story but I do have an epilogue.... So thank you for reading this. It will be a pleasure if you guy share with me how you feel about this story. Thank you.


	10. EPILOGUE

Youngjae sigh looking at his dumb brother trying to blows the balloon.

“Yah I told you not to do it like that!”

Youngjae took the balloon from Yugyeom hand and use the hand pump to blow the balloon.

“Yah why you take it from my hand? I can do it on my own!.” Yugyeom wail.

“If I let you do this, we will not have any balloon to decorate.” Youngjae

“Yah both of you are too noisy. I can’t concentrate draw!.” Bambam

“You had the easiest job but you still can’t finished it because you are so lame!” Yugyeom

“Yah who you calling as lame?” Bambam scream then throws the pillow to Yugyeom but missed and but unfortunately the pillows land exactly at Youngjae’s face.

“What the heck? Bammie? Why? Hyung didn’t do anything at all? Why are you attack me?” Youngjae

“So sorry hyung! I am so sorry. I want to throw it at Yugy…” Bambam try to explain but before he finished Youngjae already throw another pillow toward Bambam.

Yugyeom just laughing at both his brother, he is sure that appa will scold them later.

“Hey what happen?”

“Grandma!!!!.” The three boys scream and runs toward Mrs. Park.

“Oh my god, my little pie.” Mrs. Park

“There are not little anymore…” Mr Park come inside with his hands full of food container.

“Grandpa! Did you bring my favourite kimchi?” Yugyeom let go of Mrs. Park and run toward Mr Park.

“Aigoo you already so big, you used to hate even the white radish kimchi who are not that spicy.” Mr Park

“I am a big boy now grandpa.” Yugyeom grin proudly.

“Yeah yeah you are so big that you sometimes pee on the bed.” Bambam

“It was an accident and happen once only!” Yugyeom

“Now, now.. Stop bickering, we need to finished the decoration for the surprise. You guys know the plan right?”

“Yes, Uncle Jackson told us so many time already.” Youngjae

“Good, good and how you feel bout it?” Mrs. Park

“Surprisingly I don’t mind, well Bambam kinda not into it for a while but he is cool now.” Youngjae

“Yah, I didn’t say I don’t like it but it’s weird.” Bambam

“What is?” Mrs. Park

“Well we always call Jinyoung hyung as Jinyoung hyung, if he get married to appa. Did we have to call him something like father? Euwwww.” Bambam

Mrs. Park just laugh.

She still remember 5 years ago that his son comeback from Seoul after 2 weeks. She saw the kissing scene and that day her tears fall down.

It’s not easy for Jinyoung to persuade Jaebeom and make sure that Jinyoung will never leave him unless death took him and Jinyoung kept his promise.

It was hard at the first months when Jinyoung took it far by going to work from his hometown, yes, Jinyoung took extra 4 hours to go to the office even when Jaebeom told him not too. Then after long talk with Jaebeom and Jinyoung’s parent. Jinyoung finally went back to Seoul but this time Jaebeom and the kids will come and visit whenever they have free time. But Jinyoung are so worried about Jaebeom driving alone with the kids so he always beg Mark to accompany Jaebeom and told Mark he can bring Jackson on a date to Seoul after leaving Jaebeom and the kids at his house.

Mark was groaning but he still bringing them and after that going into to the date with Jackson. Jackson look so happy after their date and always bring something for Jinyoung. It’s was a win win situation, Jinyoung once said.

They keep going back and forth like this until their third year together when Jinyoung got promoted and he can now freely do his work from home and only occasionally go to the office to be on an important meeting or when he was needed.

Jinyoung never officially move to Jaebeom house but Jinyoung always be there and the kids are so happy with Jinyoung existence.

Today is their fifth year anniversaries and Jinyoung make plan with his kids (yes the brats is now his kids, Jinyoung officially adopted then a few month after he start dating Jaebeom). Jinyoung never leave out his kids with anything he do. Jinyoung even ask the kids permission to proposed to their appa.

Youngjae and Yugyeom are excited and happy with the news meanwhile Bambam are quite indifferent. He still congratulate Jinyoung but Jinyoung realize Bambam have been quiet after the news.

So one day, Jinyoung personally ask Bambam if he was okay with him getting married to Jaebeom.

“Do I have to call you daddy? I mean, I already have daddy and I love my daddy so much. I love you too Jinyoung but you are not my daddy.” Bambam

Jinyoung just look at the small kids, Bambam look so fragile. Jinyoung then pick Bambam which he whine how he is a big boy already but Jinyoung just ignore and hug him.

“You can feel like this okay Bammie? It’s fine. Of course I can’t replace your daddy. Your daddy will always be inside your heart. I know this. I also know your daddy always have a place on your appa and brother’s heart. You don’t need to call me daddy, you still can call me Jinyoung hyung or better cool Jinyoung hyung. I don’t mind at all.” Jinyoung reassure little Bambam.

“Alright, I can call you father too.”

Bambam look at Jinyoung and then they both make a puke noise.

“What time is it?” Mr Park

“They should be here another 10 minutes, everything is in order?” Jackson yell.

The best friend will never missed a day Jinyoung proposed to Jaebeom. Jackson the one who give all the idea to make a surprise proposal.

“Calm down will ya?” Mark

“How can I? Finally a proper proposal to my bestie! I mean late Youngjae just ask them to get married and they register their marriage the next day. Boring….” Jackson

“Just say you are still sulky you can’t plan Jaebeom’s marriage huh?” Mark tease his husband.

“Don’t get out of the line or you will sleep outside today.” Jackson

“By the way where are they going?” Mr Park ask.

“To daddy’s grave!” Yugyeom

Jaebeom just smile looking at Jinyoung who are now cleaning Youngjae’s grave area. Jinyoung excitedly ask Jaebeom to visit Youngjae this morning. Jaebeom don’t know why but he never says no to visit his late husband grave.

Jaebeom are just watching the way Jinyoung puts all the foods and drink and talking to Youngjae like they are good friends.

Jaebeom then look at Youngjae’s tombs name.

“I am happy. You don’t have to worry now. Thank you so much Youngjae for taking care of me and the kids. I will never forget you. You know that I will always love you right?”

The winds slowly blows and it’s make Jaebeom smile.

Meanwhile, Jinyoung keep talking with Youngjae about his plan to propose at Jaebeom and hopes that Youngjae will give his blessing toward their next step in their relationship. Jinyoung make lots of promises and one of them to make sure that Jaebeom and the kids will keep their smiles.

“You done?” Jaebeom ask Jinyoung

“Yes.”

Jaebeom then took Jinyoung wrist and give a little kiss toward Jinyoung’s finger.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“Are you hiding something from me?” Jaebeom ask when he realize Jinyoung keep fidgeting for no reason.”

“Nope. Why?” Jinyoung answer like a robot.

“You doesn’t look comfortable and you keep glancing at your phone.”

“Sorry, I was actually trying to finished up my work.”

“Jinyoung if you are busy, you don’t need to bring me. I could take the kids or just going alone.”

“And make other people see you beautiful crying face? Never. You know one of the reason my feelings come back other than they never leave is seeing your crying face. I was so dumbfounded by your beauty.”

“Silly, no one look beautiful while crying.”

“Well you are.”

“Whatever.”

Jinyoung knows Jaebeom always embarrassed whenever Jinyoung praise his looks.

They arrived home and suddenly Jinyoung feel the dread. This is happening. He will propose to his lover with the help of his family.

Before Jaebeom open the door Jinyoung slowly took his arm and kiss Jaebeom’s temple.

“What?” Jaebeom

“Just because” Jinyoung.

Jaebeom open the door and there his friends and Jinyoung’s parents holding a card each saying ‘WILL YOU MARRY PARK JINYOUNG?’ and his kids running with a card saying 'YES PLEASE SAY'.

“Yah Bammie you suppose to stand next to Yugy!.” Youngjae corrected his brother. Now the card say 'PLEASE SAY YES.'

Jaebeom was lost and dumbfounded and he turn back to see Park Jinyoung kneeling with a beautiful rings in his hand.

“Lim Jaebeom will you…”

“Yes!.”

“Let me finish first.”

“I do!.”

“Jaebeom…”

“For sure I will marry you!”

“Hey fools, you need to make Jinyoung finished his words first.” Jackson laugh

“Why should I? I will always yes yes to you! Now come here.”

Jaebeom took Jinyoung and hug him.

“Please make it PG, there is kids here.” Mark

“Uncle Mark we lived here with appa and Jinyoung hyung, we see things.” Bambam

“Yah what did you do in front of the kids?” Jackson yell.

“Nothing, we just kiss.” Jinyoung

All of them just laughing looking at the flushed face of Jaebeom and Jinyoung.

THE END.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's done! Finally even after I lose some of the will to finished this one after the news of Got7 not renewing and the thought how hard we will get the new jjp interaction but at the end I love writing about JJP so thank you again to those who still reading this story. Thank you so much.
> 
> Take care and have a nice day!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading.
> 
> You can reach me out at [CC](https://curiouscat.qa/WonderfulAhgase) & or at [Twitter](https://twitter.com/wonderfuljjp)


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